The Bridegroom to be has had the most fabulous idea on how to make sure that we please everybody when we get married and also enjoy our wedding without it being stressful.
After almost a year of intense questions that are impossible to answer from all sort of lovely people who will not be our wedding guests, Jack agrees that the two of use need to think outside of the box about our wedding.
Being engaged to someone as high profile as Jack – the level of interest it incurs, it can make you feel incredible isolated, vulnerable, cornered…and frightened. That may seem strange…I can only explain it in the context of the nightmare that dragged on for over two years. I am not going to allow myself to be the target again. Our most special, sacred occasion – it is going to be protected.
Jack has an amazing plan – and he has already put it into action. This past weekend, he revealed all to me. I am so so so soooooooooooo thrilled!!! I love the bridegroom to be. I love the way he thinks.
Almost eighty years ago, two sweethearts walked down the aisle together and said “I do”. I was told when I was growing up that my Grandfather opted for their wedding to be on the shortest day of the year, because that meant their wedding night would be the longest night of the year. Hmm hmm.
It suddenly struck me the other day…it seems to strange to be planning our wedding and for none of my grandparents to be there. I have such vivid memories of them and they had such a big influence on me. But they are fast asleep, waiting for the end of this corrupt system, before they can wake up to an earth and human family in good health.
I am on edge. My barriers have been rising higher and higher. The barrage of curious questions coming from all sources is squeezing out all of the joy.
Some people just don’t want to take “no” for an answer. Why do people think they have a right to know about your plans for one of the most important days of your life?
Am I being paranoid? Maybe a little. But if you had been through what I had – with strangers trying to ruin your relationship because they don’t want their idol to be in love with a woman who is not them – well, you would be cagey with people who you are barely acquainted with interrogating you about your wedding plans.
Jack has been trying to help me keep a sense of humour about it for months. But the pressure is getting to me. I just want to disappear with him one weekend and come back married.
I have been super-duper secretive about our wedding. People ask me endlessly annoying questions. The only way I have been able to cope with it…is to play a little game. Jack plays it too, only he is better than I am.
I tell people I am going to wear a purple and orange dress and dye my hair green for the wedding. I tell them we are going have a week-long wedding, with a different them on each day. I tell them we are not going to have flowers, we are going to have bunting and fairy lights.
Jack…well, he has added all sorts of elaborate and ridiculous details – the ten foot tall chocolate waterfall is my current favourite.
One of my friends invited me round to her home last night and tried to ply me with wine to get me to share all. So…I did. I told her straight….
Our wedding is essentially family only (because just with family we have 250 guests) and a very small select group of friends who have influenced and inspired us. Everyone who has been invited to our wedding has received a save the date card. Those who do not live near the location have been told the county the wedding will be in and Jack has asked his best man to coordinate accommodation for anyone who needs it.
Other than that…nobody needs to know where and when. We have two ladies with court injunctions prohibiting them from hanging around Jack and his family. We have strangers who do not know us but do follow Jack on social media.
Our security and being able to enjoy our wedding day without anything frightful happening is the reason why we are not answering all of the questions people ask. It’s no big deal. It’s just one day. One day. I would like it to go smoothly.
Well….what a week it has been so far. It has certainly been eventful. Here is a quick re-cap:
I had a job interview on Monday
In case you were wondering, I had technical difficulties and the assessments that were part of that interview completely confused me and I think it must have been pretty obvious that I was lost!!
I felt downhearted and slightly embarrassed on Monday evening that I had been so terrible with the assessments.
I had to check Jack understood his instructions and itinerary for the following day (our friends’ wedding)
I went to stay over with friends who the night before the wedding
I woke up on Tuesday and started getting myself ready and helping my dear friend get ready for her wedding
I received the most astonishing phone call, communicating I had not done as badly as I expected with the assessments and inviting me to the last stage of the interview. (AMAZING!!!)
We made our way to the registry office….Jack was nowhere to be seen!
I received a phone call from Jack, who was with a friend transporting the dolled up mobility scooter that was so essential to the wedding ceremony, saying they were stuck in traffic!
A friend of ours managed to come up with an ingenious solution to the lack of mobility scooter.
The wedding began (minus Jack and the sparkly mobility scooter).
Jack arrived before the vows and slipped in next to me
After the wedding ceremony and some photographs, the groom carried his bride out to the mobility scooter so she could give it a turn around the courtyard
We went back to a friend’s house for their reception – beautiful!
What an eventful week it has been so far!!! I am still amazed that after I thought I did disastrously with the assessments, I was invited to the last stage of the interview process. I still expect there are other candidates who are very worthy of this role, and have more qualifications and more up-to-date experience than myself. However, at the end of the day, the interviewers are also considering other factors, the character and qualities someone displays, and how well they will fit in with the team that are already in place. It is right and important for them to pick someone who they believe will fit in well, and be a positive contribution to the team. Something must have made them think I might potentially fit that bill. I have to be relaxed that at this last stage, I have to be relaxed with myself and also relaxed that they will pick the person who is right for their team.
LIFE – so full of twists and turns, highs and lows, challenges and joys, battles and victories – and ever so many surprises!!! I think it is important to get out there and LIVE LIFE, because you never know what is around the corner.
I am very doubtful about the interview I had on Monday, but while I await the outcome (which feels a little like waiting for a judge to decide a judicial sentence) I have something to raise my spirits today.
Two of our very special friends are going to be married today. I cannot tell you how emotional I feel about this wedding. It is going to be a tearful day. Tears of pride and joy that is.
When Jack asked me to marry him – I knew I was saying “yes” for all the right reasons. I want to be part of team Jackamel….or… Carajack. I want to be at the side of this man forever. I want to live with him, work with him, sleep with him. Mutual support, comfort and loyalty. I want to give give give with all my heart to him.
What I have always struggled with the idea of is our wedding. If we could just sign a legal contract I would be so pleased. But there is more than that to a wedding.
Whether I like it or not it is a family event. I love my family and of course I would want to share it with them. But I have a lot of relatives. Jack and I have a lot of friends and colleagues who I know are expecting for an invitation to our wedding.
I said yes to marrying Jack because I want the rest of my life to be with him. I did not say yes to him because I want a big wedding. In fact, I am starting to feel overwhelmed by the idea of a wedding. The Pandemic has postponed the issue for me, but now that lots of social distancing restrictions have lifted, people keep asking me when our wedding will be. There is no date. Jack has suggested a month in 2022, but I told him I was happy to wait for things to settle Pandemic-wise before we started making bookings.
I would have eloped with Jack the moment he asked me to marry him. I would have happily married him during the past eighteen months with a maximum of six people, (which I think would have included us, the minister, the registrar and two witnesses) only Jack was not keen on that at all.
It’s all on ice still. But I love Jack. I will be his wife, even though if I have to go through the torture of a wedding. I want a marriage with the man I love…and if I have to go through the wedding day part of it, I will.
We still have no idea when to start shopping for wedding clothes, but in the meantime Jack has decided we will start a diet. He was the one who said he wanted to lose some weight (these past few months he has not been as physically active as usual), and I said that if he loses weight, then I want to lose weight too.
Jack suggested we start in 2021. I suggested we start now (and we can have a break when we see some family at the end of the month). So that was it – we are now on a diet. December is not the time to start a diet!!! It is cold!
We are going to take it easy to begin with – no wine and no puddings. I bet that will make a difference in itself. But I am also going to think about all the extras I sometimes add to the dinner table and try to have a simpler cooking repertoire whenever Jack and I are together. But for three or four days of the week, he has to feed himself, so I will check his cupboards and try to remove the naughty items I know he sneas in there!
I had such a wonderful time with my sisters yesterday and I am looking forward to today just as much. Our time together will be over in a flash I am sure, and soon I will be longing to see them again.
I saw this dress and thought I would love to wear it myself…but it is only available in munchkin sizes. So I bought one in 18-24 months for my gorgeous niece.
Oh I do like spoiling them all. I bought gifts for Mandy and Milly too. All sorts of goodies…chockies and a jar of this and a bottle of that. I also bought Milly a new food processor as she was quite envious of mine last time she visited. Aaaaah…so lovely to have the girlies with me for the weekend.
It is pouring down…so we are having indoor fun. Which is fine…lots of very nice things to do indoors. All we want to do is chatter anyway!
Yesterday, they were telling me lots of news from my friends up north. I have missed lots of weddings because it is just not possible to travel up north every other week. They were telling me about two very very funny friends of ours who were married recently, both of the girls went along to the wedding and they had lots of photos and some videos which I loved seeing.
They had chosen to dedicate at least one evening each week for months to taking dance lessons so that they could wow everyone with their first dance at their wedding reception. Normally I can’t bear to look when a newly married couple stand up for their first dance. It can be so awkward…everyone watching. I always look the other way so I don’t start giggling!
And they certainly did wow everyone! I am not going to post a video of their first dance of course – I am sure they would not be happy about that…but to give you a little idea of their dance…
Oh my, I really do wish I had made it to that wedding!