At Rest

I have a week long holiday ahead! Isn’t that great!

I have been working hard you know!!! It is so great to be able to go to sleep without setting my alarms for the next day.

Morning Girl, Woman, Bed, Tee, Morning

Normally mornings are hard because of the head pain I have. So a whole week of being able to cooperate with my head, instead of bullying it is so appreciated.

There are a long list of things I want to catch up with this week. But right at the top of that list is: REST!

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Girl, Lady, Woman, Water, Watering Can

I’ll be helping the landlords with the garden tomorrow. I am sure I will be asked to water all the flower pots and boxes. I might have to mow the lawn. I am looking forward to it.

I think they want me to cook and freeze some meals for them as well. I am guessing that means going shopping for ingredients first.

I am laying awake in bed wishing I could sleep, but a headache is keeping me awake. It won’t go. I am tired. I will go and take some ibuprofen and hope that does the trick.

I just want to say, I know there are a lot of things that may be causing you worry. But the future for this earth and all its creatures will be better than you or I can dream. I know we have to pass through a troublesome time before then. But, there are happy times ahead.

I wish Jack was here. I miss him when he is not next to me. He whispers the loveliest of dreams to me sometimes. He has so many wonderful ideas about the future.

I’ve Been Talking In My Sleep

nasIt turns out that I am a sleep-talker. It came to my attention when I was a teenager. My sister Milly told me first (we shared a room) and then at sleep-overs with friends, they would have fun asking me questions when I began to sleep-talk.

Goldfinch told me I was sleep talking one night. I am not sure what I said but it concerned him. I do remember waking up very upset. It may have been a flashback I was having. I was a bit bewildered.

Jack has also told me that I sleep talk. He said it is normally just muttering. Sometimes he thinks I am going over a shopping list. Other times it’s as if I am trying to negotiate with someone and not doing a very good job of persuading them.

It fascinates me that while I am unconscious all sorts could be leaving my lips. I might get myself into big trouble without realizing!

Why I Love My Early Bedtimes

Light, Photoshoot, Bed, Light, Light My favourite time of day is bed time. My early bedtimes are becoming special. After a long day at work, I eat, shower and then slip between the covers. Then I let myself dream.

I allow my mind to wander over all things wonderful. I often begin by walking through a garden, a very pretty garden that opens up onto a stunning view of picturesque landscape.

I see my family and friends and others who I don’t know. But they are all smiling and glowing with good health. They are all busy. Picking fruit from the orchard or carving out wooden furniture. They are all busy, but clearly enjoying their work.

paradise 1I see the sun’s rays dance on the surface of the lake. There are children swimming in the water squealing in delight as tiny fish swim through their fingers.

I see my great-grandmother Sarah. She died before I was ever born. But I heard stories of her when I was a little girl. She was brought back to life forty years after the end of the old system and the beginning of the new. It has been wonderful to get to know her. I will never forget my grandmother’s face when she welcomed back her mother.

My dreams before bedtime are the most wonderful part of each day. I fall asleep with my mind and heart at peace in the knowledge that all of the damage will be undone. I dream of all the wonderful scenes that will take place in our future. Our Creator cares for you and I more than we could ever imagine. All the damage will be undone. Our dreams of a happy healthy life for us and all our loved ones will come true. Our dreams of paradise will be a reality.

Good night…xx

Scheduled Naps

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Of late, I have re-discovered the joys of afternoon napping.

I don’t like being ill, but afternoon naps are sweet! So are early bedtimes and lazy mornings. I am so glad that I only have to work for five hours today. By the time I am home, it will time for Masterchef and then another early bed time for me.

At some point this insane coughing has to stop. Jack said I should drink whisky to burn it off. I can’t stand whisky, but I feel as if there has to be a substance that will dissolve whatever it is that is stuck in my chest – (I have already had a bottle and a half of guaifenesin, it’s not shifting it).

I love sleep.

So Close To Freaking Out!

Do you know when you have had one of those colds that has become worse and worse? Mine has become awful since it descended onto my chest. I can’t stop coughing!

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It’s worse at night, when I am desperate for sleep. I have tried smothering myself and my pillows with decongestants, and propping myself up with pillows to try to sleep. But last night because my coughing was keeping me awake for so long, I resorted to taking some drowsy cough medicine. I am not great with medicines, they seem to have ten times the intended effect on me. But I was so desperate for sleep.

It didn’t take long before I was fast asleep. Lovely 🙂

Until…early this morning…

…right outside my bedroom window…

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…came this noise (it seemed as if it was on full blast…but I am sure I heard it much louder than the rest of our neighbours.

I woke up to Chic “Le Freak”, known to many as “Freak Out”. Well, despite normally liking this song, at seven o’clock in the morning, I felt pretty close to freaking out I will admit. Builders! In fact, I cannot tell you how close I was to freaking out at them. I wanted to open my window up wide (I had it open a couple of inches to let some fresh air into the room) and ask them if they were insane – playing music at that time of the morning? Grrrr!

I Think I Am The Biggest Hazard!

I was back late after what turned out to be a sixteen hour work day on Friday and I finally made it to sleep at two o’clock in the morning. Then my alarm went off at four o’clock in the morning. I did something very risky. I pressed SNOOZE!

An hour later my phone was ringing and ringing. My friends were outside in their car. Very kindly they waited ten minutes while I showered and threw some clothes on.

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I am working all day as a volunteer. But with so little sleep…I think it is going to be a very long day. Where is the canteen? I need a coffee pleeeeeeeeeease!

I am just going to take it slowly and try not to cause any injury to myself of anyone else!

Sweet Dreams

The night is drawing in over here in little olde England. I know that America and Canada are way behind England – time-wise I mean of course…but I am struggling to keep my eyes open!!

So…I think I am going to have to close my lap-top down and start getting ready for bed before I conk out here on the sofa.

If there are any bloggers who are still baking and intend to send over some cake photos – I will see them tomorrow morning when I wake up and make sure they are forwarded to Jean and are added to the cake parade. Once the last photos arrive, it will be up to Jeanne to decide who the STAR BAKER is.

We are so impressed by the cakes that have been made – and overwhelmed by the wonderful support for

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Goodnight for now! Sweet dreams – I think I will be dreaming of a giant cake with a slice of every bloggers’ cake within it.

I am going to re-blog the MUSIC TO BAKE TO post later just in case any of you are still working away in the kitchen.

 

 

Missing My Sleepy Saturday Morning

By the time you read this post I will be on my way to work. Normally I work long hours Wednesday and Thursday and then a fifteen hour work day on a Friday which ends at midnight. But this week I am also working on Saturday. So I am completely missing out on my nice slow sleepy Saturday morning this week.

I am dreading Saturday for so many reasons! For a start, I will be tired from the moment I wake up after my marathon Friday. Mornings are hilarious for me! I wake up with my head feeling as if someone is squeezing it in a vice and I do this weird crawl/shuffle towards my pain killers and water.

Then I make my way in the same mode to the Nespresso machine. I sip my coffee and watch the BBC Breakfast news, although at that point I cannot actually take any information in. But the presenters  have friendly faces and that’s all that matters. Just a nice cheerful face with smiles to encourage me that it is all going to be alright. I just need to wait for about twenty minutes or so for that pain to ease off. By that time I am ready for breakfast.

Today breakfast was a bagel. It was very nice. I decided I needed a treat because I know Saturday is going to be a long old day. So I bought some cinnamon and raisin bagels. Very pleasant start to the day I have to say.

Normally two girls who are very good at their job work together on Saturdays. Saturdays are by far our busiest day. In fact it is intense. I have only ever done one Saturday and it was a big shock to me. However, because both of the girls will be away tomorrow, I will be working the very busy Saturday shift with my manager (who is really really good at her job) and I am petrified.

The pace will be intense because we have such a massive foot-fall on Saturdays. I am going to be flapping – I just know it! I have a feeling my manager is going to wonder what I am doing, because I will be overwhelmed I am quite sure. Clients are going to be asking me all sorts of questions I can’t answer, and in front of my manager, I can’t really say, “I’m new, I don’t have a clue!”  Maybe I am not giving myself credit where it’s due. I know customers are pleased with me for being friendly, helpful and a good communicator. My technical knowledge is so limited though. Oh well, I have known I was going to be doing this coming Saturday for some time, I have to go through with it.

To be honest it is probably a really good opportunity for me to learn a lot from my manager. She has over thirty years experience in her field and she explains things so clearly. It is probably a priceless chance to expand my knowledge and understanding of our policies and processes.

To give me something to look forward to…I have a roasted vegetable and hummus sandwich which I am looking forward to devouring at lunch time.

Oh boy oh boy – so worried about my long working Saturday! I do hope London folk are kind to me! I am just a kiddo and I have no idea what I am talking about half the time, only I need to look as if I am not completely hopeless in front of my manager!

 

 

 

FOWC with Fandango — Credit

Lessons In Love From All Directions

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Here is a depressing thought…Anna Karenina! However, this is what I thought when I saw this picture prompt from The Haunted Wordsmith.

Many years ago, I read Leo Tolstoy’s Anna Karenina…perhaps I was too young. I found parts of it interesting, I was fascinated by “Kostya” (Konstantin LĂ«vin) and read the pages detailing his mind’s journey avidly. I don’t to detract from Leo Tolstoy’s epic accomplishments.

However, reading about Anna depressed me. It didn’t seem like a love story at all, but a tale of how someone descends down the road to despair. I became truly deeply morose to the point I could not face what was happening to her. She seemed so utterly lost.

I think I preferred reading “War And Peace” very much more than Anna Karenina. I did not feel myself sinking so deeply into misery. Although, I read it a couple of years after I read Anna Karenina, so perhaps that was something to do with being a bit older.

There are many classic books I could read over and over again, but I don’t think I will ever be able to face Anna Karenina again, I don’t want to make myself miserable.

Although romantic love can be a very intense feeling and can lead one to the most dramatic decisions and displays…I have always felt that there is a borderline between love that energizes you and inspires you, and the type of love where you have lost all perspective and it is becoming destructive to your happiness.

Anna Karenina brought me to the conclusion not to let myself become that intense. I have never wanted to find myself trapped in a loveless marriage (I am not sure whether I mentioned I turned down two marriage proposals – one expected, one completely unexpected) because my Mumma always used to warn me that there is the potential for great happiness or great unhappiness in marriage.

However I have wanted to learn to love in a balanced, healthy, energising, inspiring, rewarding, satisfying, caring, active, practical and unselfish way. I feel as if the positive examples of my parents and other family and friends have given me an idea of what a happy loyal love can be. I feel as if my years of volunteering have helped nurture in me great capacity for caring, practical, active and unselfish love.

There are three men who have had a significant impact on me. The first was my teenage sweetheart whom I was in love with from the age of 17-24 and I thought I would marry (I will tell you about that one day). The second was my ex-neighbour, Jack. I have a lot more to tell you about Jack. The third is Goldfinch.

I am so sleepy now…I don’t know where I am going anymore with this post!!!! I started with Karenina…very sad, very depressing. And moved onto positive examples of love. I realize I have many many stories to tell you still. But they will have to wait, because I need to sleep! I can see what is going to happen if I carry on here!

 

 

 

 

 

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