Well…I admit, there is something rather lovely about romantic surprises. Please forgive me if I have a skip in my step and a song in my voice all week…I think I am shamelessly in love.
I was already in love – but a twist of romance seems to heighten the giddy excitement of love. It is a sweet sweet feeling – one that I wish I could bottle up for rainy days.
Around two months ago, I think that Jack suddenly realized that the Pandemic was sort of “over” – specifically the many restrictions designed to prevent the spread of the virus and to protect those who were especially vulnerable.
Jack has had this air of “right, let’s do this!” He has bee surprising me with little treats ever since. Romantic ideas he has had for the past few years but he could not carry out (we started dating at the end of 2019, were separated when Jack was in Africa for longer than expected at the start of the Pandemic, formed a social bubble when he returned to London, and became engaged in October 2020).
Jack seems to be making up for lost time…
…and I have to admit…it is very lovely!
One of the most traumatic experiences in mundane life…is having a bra fitting. The Pandemic seemed to suspend bra fitting services for a long time, so I put up with older bras, and bought a couple of bras online that were the same size I was used to wearing.
But I knew things were not quite right. So…a few weeks ago….off I went for a professional bra fitting – and yes, it was as awful as ever, but the result – a perfectly fitting bra.
And…well, Jack noticed the difference. With his newfound knowledge of my up-to-date measurements, he decided that he would make a rather raise your eye brows purchase.
Jack buying me lingerie! I have to pinch myself. Seven years ago….what am I saying?…three years ago!!!…Jack and I were not on speaking terms. Now we are arguing about where to have our wedding reception.
The trauma…the trauma that awful time…it has passed…the celebration of Jack and me is a wonderful treat I want to linger in always.
There is love in my heart, love that is bursting to escape. It is a great pounding, thumping kind of love that is impossible to ignore. Mundane life denies the opportunity for me to sing from the rooftops and swing from the stars in sheer jubilation.
I was struck, struck with all the madness and chaos that romantic love brings along with it. I now dance upon the clouds from dawn til dusk and yet I restrain myself, for the world expects me to just sit still and process.
All that time, the external observer may regard me remaining still and devoted to my tasks – and yet they may miss the fact that internally, there are waterfalls and fireworks and orchestras all celebrating and inspiring and enrapturing me.
I am purely love-struck – and I am thankful that I met you and grew to know you and fell in love with you – it has brought something extra to my life that energizes me in ways I had no idea were possible.
Thank you!
I found writing the LEARNERS AT LOVE series incredibly enjoyably and deeply satisfying. I am sure every other writer can understand that. I was going through my older posts and I remembered that a writing prompt from Kristian and Nova gave me the inspiration to give Dean an appearance in Annabelle’s journey. I love the way Dean turned out!!
In less than a month we will be putting our sandals and summer clothes into storage and pulling out scarves, and woolly jumpers! Autumn or fall is heading our way in the northern hemisphere.
And in less than thirty days Kristian and Nova are going to be hosting a Falling Into Autumn Blog party. To start the countdown Kristian has provided a gorgeous photo as a writing prompt:
Kristian told us:
“I am not putting any limitations on this. You may write as many words as you see fit. It can be a short story, poem, a paragraph, whatever your heart desires.”
Well, I loved Kristian’s photo prompt and all sorts of ideas went through my head. But at the moment I am fixated with working out what is going to happen to my fictional character Annabelle Riley.
In this post, I have let my thoughts wander to a character who has only received a couple of very brief mentions so far and has not yet been named, but he is about to make an appearance in Annabelle’s story. In the meantime, I thought I would use the photo as a setting for a conversation between Chris and Annabelle about this mysterious character. The two of them are sitting in that blue truck in Kristian’s photo, looking out at the lake and the trees.
As soon as Chris stopped his truck he turned to Annabelle, “I was told that this guy hurt you. Why do you feel like you want to make contact with him now?”
“Did Gina tell you that? asked Annabelle.
“Gina? No, it was Pearl. Did you tell my sister about this guy?” asked Chris in surprise.
“I mentioned him.” Annabelle’s face reddened.
“She didn’t say anything about that to me.”
“I haven’t told Burt and Pearl a lot about him. I couldn’t really without concerning them. But Gina was so kind when she came over, I found it very easy to talk to her.”
“She’s a great listener.” grinned Chris.
“Indeed, you have a great sister. I am envious.”
Chris’ fingers brushed over the back of Annabelle’s hand which was wrapped around her seat, “So tell me, why now? Is it really going to help?”
“I think that to go forward, I need to go back a little. Dean always used to say to me that there is no going back, you can only go forward. But I can’t go forward Chris, not until I go back and clear up a few things. Dean is someone I owe a lot to. I think I owe him some explaining, some apologising.”
“Annie, this isn’t you going overboard with guilt again – is it?”
“These CBT appointments are giving me a lot to think about. I feel as if there are a lot of things I have said and done that I ought to feel bad about. I want to do what I can to fix them.”
Chris heaved a sigh and tapped his hands on the steering wheel. “Annabelle, we all make mistakes. You can’t undo all of them. Look at all those millions of leaves out there. You can’t go chasing after every single leaf to clear this place up. It’s impossible. All of us have said probably a million things that maybe we shouldn’t have. We would go crazy if we tried to undo everything we think we said wrong.”
“At the moment Chris, there are lots of little explosions going on in my head. I am realizing things that I have not been aware of before. Some of these things I can just accept as a lesson learnt. But other things make me feel a sense of responsibility that what I did has had a big effect on someone else’s life. I have been talking to Robin about some of that. But the other person who I keep on thinking about is Dean.”
“Ok, so you’re going to write to him to get everything off your chest.”
“No. I am going to write to him and ask him if I can see him.”
Chris shook his head in disbelief, “You’re funny – do you know that?”
“What? What’s wrong with that?”
“You actually want to go and see your ex. Some guy who badly hurt you. Is Robin ok with that?”
“Robin knows that I have a lot of regrets about what happened with Dean and me. I haven’t mentioned it to him yet, but I do think he will understand.”
“So are you going back to New York? Is that where Dean lives?”
Annabelle was clearly very hesitant to answer, “Dean has a place on the west coast. But he travels a lot, for work, so I am going to ask him where is best for him to meet?”
“And do you think he will agree to meeting you? What makes you think he is going to want to rake up the past with you?”
Annabelle shrugged her shoulders, “Well, I’ll have to wait and see.”
“Annie, I am going to support you whatever you decide to do. I really want to help you get through this. But everything you have ever said or done, even your mistakes, it’s all part of you. It’s made you the person you are today. Look at all those million of leaves out there. Why would you want to change that? You might see a single leaf and think it’s all crumpled and discoloured. But together they make something beautiful. Don’t forget that, whatever you have done in the past, it’s all helped to make a beautiful person who we love. Robin loves you, Burt and Pearl love you, most of Blackwood love you and I love you – mistakes and all. We love you the way you are.”
“Thanks Bruno Mars.”
“I was thinking of James Blunt actually. Come on, I need to stretch my legs, let’s go and kick some leaves.” Chris and Annabelle both climbed out of the truck and started walking down towards the lake in front of them.
“Ha ha, my mistake! Let’s add that one to the pile of crumpled leaves hey.”
“Something else to love about Annabelle Riley – terrible knowledge of music.” Chris grabbed hold of Annabelle’s hand and squeezed it in his.
“Well, now that you say that…” Annabelle paused.
“What? Are you going to claim you are an expert on music?”
“Christopher Ward, there is a lot you don’t know about me.”
When I was poorly sick just over a week ago, I was looking for something on television to distract me. I chose a film I have seen before. A dramatisation of Charlotte Bronte’ “Jane Eyre”. I read the book as a teenager, and I did think it quite wonderful. although I am not the biggest fan of any of the Bronte sisters in all honesty. So dramatic! I do prefer a more light-hearted cheerier romance in all honesty! I can just about cope with the dramatic, but some of the Bronte’s writings are more on the traumatic side!
But nonetheless, I did love Jane and wanted her to be happy. It seemed clear that it was only her devotion for Mr Rochester that could finally be expressed with a clear conscience that could make her really happy.
But I was struck by one particular scene in the 2011 dramatisation I watched. I have seen it acted out by others, but I really really was moved by this proposal scene.
I am such a softie! I love a romance. I totally understood the distraught conscience that plagued Jane. I absolutely understood that she could not force herself to love someone else, even though he was everything deemed proper. “Enough of love” indeed!
One of the ways I show love is acts of service (oooh that post is still in my drafts folder) and I can easily relate to the thought of loving a man who I could be useful to and express my devotion too. What I do like about Jane Eyre – is the portrayal of a love story in circumstances that are far from perfect. Had Jane and Mr Rochester crossed paths years earlier they may not have suited each other at all. But now after life has inflicted all sorts of blows and to some extent blessings – they find exactly what they need in each other.
I do love a happy-ish ending.
Last night I came home much earlier than I was expecting because there was an electrical outage at the venue I was going to be spending the evening. The group I was with realized we were going to have to break off into smaller parties and enjoy the rest of the evening elsewhere. Although I was torn because I had been looking forward to a night out with great friends, I…opted for home. I was only ten minutes away from home and I dreaded the thought of heading off in the other direction and having to join the search for a restaurant or bar that was able to accommodate us without reservations.
Coming home early was the right decision. I had a bath and pampered myself., with products from the gift basket I was recently left by a good friend whom was a guest for a couple of nights in my sweet little abode. I put on my pyjamas (my pyjamas are completely the opposite to diaphanous) and my snuggly socks and I rang one of my sisters and then two of my friends. After all that, I realized I still had time to catch up with reading posts from bloggers I love.
One of my favourite blogs is Everyday Strange created by L. Stevens. Her Muse Of The Day two days ago (yes I am way way behind with my reading) in this post caught my eye:
https://everydaystrangeblog.wordpress.com/2018/09/17/muse-of-the-day-13/comment-page-1/#comment-3549
Those words right at the end there…
“…remorse inevitably follows.”
…I have a story (another confession) which I am going to start and leave in my drafts folder to develop at a later date, of a time I delivered a zinger…and felt huge remorse afterwards. It was one evening when Jack had pushed my buttons. He seemed to think he could humiliate me in front of friends and others at social events. My feelings had been brewing, and then in response to a rather sly remark, I delivered a zinger, a perfect blend of poetry and meanness!
Jack was shocked. My friends were shocked. I was shocked! I did not know I had it in me to formulate a zinger and deliver it with such timing and precision that the whole room went quiet and Jack looked hurt to the core.
“….remorse inevitably followed!”
Oh Jack, how I wish I could take back my zinger! You are the last man on the planet I would ever want to hurt or humiliate!
Joe Fox and Kathleen Kelly illustrate the subject of zingers so well:
https://fivedotoh.com/2018/09/20/fowc-with-fandango-guest/
I was scrolling through the posts from other bloggers displayed in my WordPress Reader today and I came across the writing prompt from Paula Light, creator of Light Motifs II. I have had a busy few months and I don’t think I have actually participated in a THURSDAY INSPIRATION prompt before.
https://lightmotifs.wordpress.com/2019/08/08/thursday-inspiration-16/
But this great photo gave me lots of ideas. So I have tried to stick with just one. But I will be honest with you…my baaaaaaad poetry style took over and I have ruined my idea. There was potential there, but I feel disappointed with the results. Oh well…never give up hey! Keep on trying to develop your writing. Here is my attempt to write a clever poem in response to Paula’s fantastic writing prompt:
Seeing the caravan I could have cried
Bob must have thought my face quite a sight
When I realized the bed was four foot wide
But that was nowt compared to my fright
As the caravan swayed from side to side
The fierce wind blowing throughout the night
Worrying we’d be swept out with the tide
I curled up and held onto Bob tight
“Isn’t this romantic?” said Bob
Morning came and the cliff-top was still there
Excited by his plans for the day
Bob led the way off to Scarborough fair
The sky overhead gloomy and grey
A stick with candy floss for two to share
Ferris wheel first, up and away
Bob gave me a squeeze and played with my hair
I tried my best to be droll and gay
“Isn’t this romantic?” said Bob
Into my ear Bob started to sing
“Your kisses are sweeter than white wine.”
Bob knelt on one knee and out came a ring
“We don’t need perfect skies or sunshine
Together we can face what life may bring
Because I am yours and you are mine”
“Sorry Bob, to me you’ve been just a fling
But this weekend you have crossed the line
This is not remotely romantic”, said I
It was clear to see I’d broken Bob’s heart
He asked me why? I exclaimed “Oh Gosh!”
He told me he hoped that we would never part
His romantic drivel seemed such tosh
“The caravan and the fair for a start
Quite an ordeal for someone so posh
I like the classics, music and art
You simply don’t earn nearly enough dosh
You are not remotely romantic”, said I
I found the one I want to mate with
To be with for the rest of my days
You’re the perfect companion for me
I’m in love with all your little ways
Next to you it feels so warm and snug
From your side, I never want to part
Where you go, I’ll go, forever true
If you waddled off, you’d break my heart
There was something in the air that night
The silence amplified every sound
He touched my hand, a spark shot through me
He drew me close, then span me around
Two smitten hearts were struck with lighting
That look of passion deep in his eyes
Declaring he was yearning for me
Breathless as my pulse began to rise
In his strong arms I felt so alive
He led me on quite a merry dance
Had me magnetised right to his side
Electric charging a sweet romance
This was in response to THE ELEMENTAL CHALLENGE hosted by Teresa aka The Haunted Wordsmith:
https://thehauntedwordsmith.wordpress.com/2019/04/05/elemental-writing-challenge-april-5/
Caramel 