Tag Archives: love

The Bride To Be

The Bridegroom to be has had the most fabulous idea on how to make sure that we please everybody when we get married and also enjoy our wedding without it being stressful.

After almost a year of intense questions that are impossible to answer from all sort of lovely people who will not be our wedding guests, Jack agrees that the two of use need to think outside of the box about our wedding.

Being engaged to someone as high profile as Jack – the level of interest it incurs, it can make you feel incredible isolated, vulnerable, cornered…and frightened. That may seem strange…I can only explain it in the context of the nightmare that dragged on for over two years. I am not going to allow myself to be the target again. Our most special, sacred occasion – it is going to be protected.

Jack has an amazing plan – and he has already put it into action. This past weekend, he revealed all to me. I am so so so soooooooooooo thrilled!!! I love the bridegroom to be. I love the way he thinks.

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He Makes Me Happy So I Make Him Happy

Jack has filled me with happiness this week. So…I am baking for him (and more particularly, a group of youths he has a regular training session with) which I know will make him very happy.

I found a brownie recipe with peanuts, peanut butter and jam…it looks great.

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I really love to do things to make Jack smile…to make Jack happy…it is a new dimension to my purpose in life these past three years – and it feels so good!

What I love the most though…is that this time four years ago…he and were still estranged. But so much has happened. Forgiveness, peace, joy and love – they are such powerful forces.

Shamelessly In Love

Well…I admit, there is something rather lovely about romantic surprises. Please forgive me if I have a skip in my step and a song in my voice all week…I think I am shamelessly in love.

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I was already in love – but a twist of romance seems to heighten the giddy excitement of love. It is a sweet sweet feeling – one that I wish I could bottle up for rainy days.

I Want Every Morning

I try to be a contented sort of person, one who counts her blessings and stays grateful. However, I sometimes hate having to share you. I love waking up next to you on Sunday and Monday mornings. I am so excited when you come early and stay with my on Friday night as well. But I want more.

Perhaps I am greedy, but I want you to be there every morning and to be there every night when I close my eyes. I love your messages – they lift my heart – but a text is not as warm as a hug and not as tingling as a kiss.

I am so proud of you and all you do. I think the world of you – truly. When I said “Yes”, what I meant was that I want to share everyday with you. I know that will not always be possible, but I hope to have many many more days and nights with you than we currently do.

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The Epic Journey Of Love

Last night I had some peace and quiet to myself after work and I am so glad. I needed a chance to relax. I wondered what to do with my time, knowing I needed it to be non-work related. So after crossing off the list:

  • cleaning the bathroom
  • completing a training course for work
  • sorting out my storage room (which is chaotic right now)

…and some other non-relaxing tasks, I decided that I was too tired to read and instead I would peruse the television channels in search of something worthwhile.

My heart leapt when I saw a word that means so much to me – “Persuasion“. I have lost track of how many times I have read the book or watched a dramatisation of this brilliant Jane Austen novel. But I needed to watch it again. I needed to watch it because I love Anne Elliott dearly.

What a journey – what an incredible journey!! I know exactly what happens, and yet every time I read or watch “Persuasion” I go on exactly the same journey again. Those stabs of pain – how they pierce. The highs and lows of love, the aches and elations of love, the hopes, the disappointments, the bravery, the humiliation, the longing, the grief and the jubilant celebration when finally love conquers all obstacles and you just know that now that these two compelling characters have finally bridged the chasm and connected – it will be a less manic journey from now on.

What a journey love is. Not so sure about “happily ever after”, but I would say that once you finally overcome the rollercoaster of emotions that lead you to saying “Yes, I will be your wife” – well it is less manic ever after.

There are still challenges, some very tough challenges, but you navigate them with that awareness and understanding of love. It does not send you reeling like a pendulum. You seem to be able to maintain a direction, a momentum, and even if challenges feel like a storm, somehow it is a more secure feeling because of the purpose and fulfilment that love has brought to you.

I will never tire of the epic journey of love. It moves me everytime – the story of Anne Elliott moves me. The story of my fictional character Annabelle Riley moves me. The story of Jack and me – it moves me. What an epic journey – one that takes an average person and makes them a hero, and adventurer, a conqueror.

Such A Cute Little Munchkin

Jack has been all kitted out in woollies for the past couple of weeks (we had a fortnight of freeeeeeeezing temperatures here in the UK) and he looked so adorable in his hat. It makes his face look just a little chubby – in a very lovely way, a very smiley way with red cheeks.

He is so absolutely gorgeous. He has reminded me of a cute little kiddo these past two weeks. Love him so much.

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Snowflakes That Stay On My Eye Lashes

When I left the little nest this morning, there was an inch of crunch snow, and patches of scary looking ice. When I walked home tonight, some of the snow had clearly melted, but there was more ice, pretty lethal patches of ice actually. I was wearing proper boots with a grip, but I skidded and slipped a few times on the way home – although I did manage to stay upright.

The snow is bringing back memories though…a precious gem from my treasure chest. That weekend that Goldfinch was here and it was snowing! Aaaaah – sweet bliss! I remember the butterflies fluttering within whenever he was near. His visit during a snowy weekend…so many happy memories.

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Happy Dappy Thoughts

Being in love with someone…it can make you incredibly ditzy and dappy. Sensible people would look at you and see how silly and soppy you are being. How unbalanced and unrealistic, how foolish and hasty you are being.

Yet…we do fall in love…and it is the most exciting whirlwind of wonder. The happy dappy thoughts, the fuzzy cuddly memories, the glow, the ecstatic glow that there is a someone out there who has had the same incredible and ridiculous and magnificent reaction…yes, they have fallen in love with you.

Aaaah – love can be so intoxicating!