I have a few entities who I work for – some paid, some non-paid. All of them say I am entitled to annual leave or “holiday”. But sometimes, it is hard to coordinate my time off with each entity at the same time as another.
I addition, the “holiday-year” runs differently for each entity. For two of them, the holiday year runs from 1st January – 31st December, for two others, from 1st April – 31st March, for four others the year starts 1st September and ends 31st August and recently I started working for an employer who told me my holiday year started my first day, so my holiday year with them will start and end mid-November every year.
So…if want time away (say for something like a secret wedding and honeymoon) I have to ask all of these entities if I can use my annual leave allowance. It can sometimes be a right pain in the neck – let me tell you!!!
Somehow, I end up not using up some or most of my holiday time. At the end of December, I had over three weeks of unused holiday time for two organizations. I am mindful that as I approach March, I have weeks of unused annual leave for other organizations.
The thing is…I really really really think I need some time off…and I think I need it soon. I am slightly shattered recently. I am managing. I am doing everything I do, but what I notice is that when I arrive home…I am too weary to be creative. I need time to relax and to enjoy some recreation.
I also want to be creative. My mind is bursting with creative ideas. Yet I am so wiped out, it is hard to actually execute my ideas.
I am not so sure taking a week off would make the difference, but I would love to have that time to do the things I have to let drop down the list of priorities. I would love some time to unwind mentally…and to be able to write and do other creative things, including wedding things.
Well, I am going to admit that I always feel a bit uncomfortable about the word “creative”. All the way through school, I was the one who achieved 100% exam results in maths, and could churn out twenty page essays in English and History. I wasn’t bad at languages. I was on all the school sports teams. But could I draw or make anything out of clay, wood, metal, cloth or wool? Nope!
However…since I have been blogging, other bloggers have taught me more than a few things. For example, before I started blogging, I had no idea what flash-fiction was. But I have been reading such clever short stories with brilliant twists from the likes of Teresa, aka 
I have thought a lot about Ursula’s comment. As I mentioned previously, I have never considered myself as creative, more academic in all honesty. But Ursula helped me to see that even though most of my posts are actually about my life, it is becoming through the writing process, “creative art”.
I am very much writing from the heart. But writing is helping me sift through all sorts of thoughts and emotions and in some ways refine parts of me, helping me discard some of the dross now that I have finally dug it out of the sunken depths of my inner heart, and helped me to polish up the parts of me that I feel most content and pleased with. So in many ways it is helping me to become the person who I want to be.
Does that explain why I am who I am? Who knows? But I do realize that since I became conscious of being alive, my earliest memories of childhood have been shaping the person I am today.
I realize how much of me was formed in my early years, my understanding of what is important in life, what the purpose of life is, why humans die, what hope there is for those who have died, how to get along with other people, learning how to cope with mistakes, developing qualities that would make me a good person and learning from the example my parents were setting.
I must admit, I know not all have had the privilege I have of two honest, hard-working, reliable, down-to-earth, gorgeous parents. Neither of whom can draw!!!
There is a universe inside your head!
I don’t think many of us are living the way we were designed to. Currently we live in a system that often turns us into the proverbial hamster running endlessly round and round the same old routine.
I find that the world that man has built seems to stifle something deep inside of me. I rebel against it frequently. I need nature, creation. I don’t watch much TV, but I love a good documentary about creation like BBC’s “The Blue Planet” series.
Caramel 