Tag Archives: blogging

Numb and Unsteady

Jim Adams, aka Newepicauthor, the creator of A Unique Title For Me, is hosting SONG-LYRIC-SUNDAY and this week he has chosen the theme: SONGS WITH ONE WORD TITLES

Well….something strange has happened. I am sure I chose a song a month ago and prepared a post but it has vanished into thin air. So here I am at the last minute trying to think of the song and wishing I could remember what my original post was!! My memory is fading!!! This is what happens when you are twenty-one*. (I’m twenty-one forever – ok!)

Woman, Country Side, Hat, Summer, Field

Some songs just seem to fit the total discombobulation we have all felt during the past year!!! I amused myself at one point by putting together my own little Pandemic Compilation, and I remember noticing that almost all the songs on my list had one word titles. It’s all we could cope with this past year. Just keep things simple! We cannot keep up with all these changes!!

My inspiration for this is a song I only discovered through a film…a film dramatization of a novel. The song is called “Numb” and it is from the one and only Max Jury! Today we are giving out a special prize of a year’s supply of toilet roll to the first person who can come up with which film I heard this in. (Actually, Jack is telling me not to give away any toilet rolls, we still don’t know what the rest of 2021 has in store!)

OK….if you can’t guess, and you want to know the answer….scroll down to the second song in this post. This week I am giving you two songs with one word titles….I will let you scroll down to see which it is!

Hhhmmm… Hhmm!
Hhhmmm… Hhmm!
Hhhmmm… Hhmm!
Hhhmmm… Hhmm!

Honey, here I go again, Hhhmmm…
Down that crooked road of sin, Hhhmmm…
My momma locked me out again, Hhhmmm… Hhmmhhmm!
And hung me high to rust under the rain

I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, Oohhh… Ohh… Ohh
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, Oohhh…

When I sing my stranger blues, Hhhmmm… Hhmm!
I make it on the local news, Hhhmmm… Hhmm!
Everybody likes to see you lose, Hhhmmm… Hhmm… Hhmm!
And hang you high to rust under the rain

I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, Oohhh… Ohh… Ohh

Little bluebird at my window
Sing a pretty song for me
Don’t you know that you can fly, fly, fly away
Don’t you know that you can leave

I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb
I am numb, I’m numb

Written by: Max Jury, Dean Josiah

______________________

The second song today – with a one word title of course, is called “Unsteady”…and I love it!!! It is from the mighty X Ambassadors.

Hold
Hold on
Hold on to me
‘Cause I’m a little unsteady
A little unsteady
Hold
Hold on
Hold on to me
‘Cause I’m a little unsteady
A little unsteady

Momma
Come here
Approach
Appear
Daddy
I’m alone
‘Cause this house don’t feel like home

If you love me
Don’t let go
If you love me
Don’t let go

Hold
Hold on
Hold on to me
‘Cause I’m a little unsteady
A little unsteady
Hold
Hold on
Hold on to me
‘Cause I’m a little unsteady
A little unsteady

Mother
I know
That you’re tired of being alone
Dad I know you’re trying
To fight when you feel like flying

But if you love me
Don’t let go
If you love me
Don’t let go

Hold
Hold on
Hold on to me
‘Cause I’m a little unsteady
A little unsteady
Hold
Hold on
Hold on to me
‘Cause I’m a little unsteady
A little unsteady
Hold
Hold on
Hold on to me
‘Cause I’m a little unsteady
A little unsteady

Written By: Adam Levin, Noah G Feldshuh, Alexander Junior Grant, Casey Wakeley Harris and Samuel Nelson Harris

Learning From Mumma Bear

My mum is very sweet, I have to say. Believe me…it is not just me that thinks so. People love my mum! In the town we grew up in, everyone knew my mum and people loved her. They thought she had a gorgeous personality. She was always smiling, always chatting, always showing kindness.

Just over ten years ago, once we had all left home, my parents moved closer to my grandfather so they could help him as his health was starting to decline. In the village they now live in, people have come to know and love my mum. She has the same gorgeous personality. People say exactly the same things as they did in my home town – your mum is always smiling, so friendly, so kind.

Yup that’s my mumma! I have so many stories about the people whose lives she has touched, I could easily fill a book about Mumma Bear. We could not have asked for a better example of how to be a gorgeous human being than our Mumma Bear!

Teddy Bear, Teddy, Bear, Stuffed Animal

Besides all the work at home, caring for a huge family, Mum did not work for money when we were younger. She wanted to be around for us during our early years. She felt starting work before we were at school would disrupt our development…or something like that. But once my youngest sister Milly had started school, Mumma then decided to go back to nursing. For several years she worked on an endoscopy unit in the nearby hospital.

I remember the very first time she received wages. After years of gratefully accepting hand-me-downs from other kind families, Mumma wanted to go out and buy us something new. There was a new shop in the local shopping centre and they had some beautiful teddy bears. Mum bought one for the three of us “little ones”. I must have been ten years old at this time, because Milly was now at school. Mine was a slightly ginger brown. I called my teddy “Max”. Milly had a white bear which she named “Snowy”. Mandy, her more beige brown bear she named “Honey”.

Three bears for three little girls. We were so grateful to Mumma Bear. We all treasured those bears. I still had Max when I left home in my mid-twenties!

That was not the only treat. Mumma Bear really wanted to treat us. She took us to a local restaurant which was famous for their naughty puddings and desserts. I ordered a Banana Split. Milly ordered a knickerbocker-glory. Mandy ordered a salad! A salad…just about the farthest thing from a naughty dessert!

Aaaaah! It’s nice to reminisce over the pages and pages of special memories of those you love. Mumma Bear was the perfect mother to the three little girls, who still think she is one of the sweetest people on the planet.

I Should’ve Bought You Flowers

Flower, Bouquet, Rose, Roses, Pink

Jim Adams, aka Newepicauthor, the creator of A Unique Title For Me, is hosting SONG-LYRIC-SUNDAY and this week he has chosen a theme suggested by Amy: BLOSSOM/CHERRY/FLOWERS

How lovely!!! This is exactly what I want to think about right now. This is the time of year when the road I live on is probably at it’s most spectacular. There are so many magnolia trees and fruit trees. As I walk along pink petals swirl thought the air. It is just gorgeous. I saw my first bluebells yesterday. It is so good for the heart to see so much beauty.

Jack picked a song for me this week. This is a song that Jack said he found very hard to hear for some time. I am not going to say too much, because it is all water under the bridge now. But I guess this is a song about regret. I am so glad for my own sake and for Jack’s that things worked out for us. Regrets can be sheer torment.

Same bed but it feels just a little bit bigger now
Our song on the radio but it don’t sound the same
When our friends talk about you, all it does is just tear me down
‘Cause my heart breaks a little when I hear your name

It all just sounds like oooooh…
Mmm, too young, too dumb to realize
That I should’ve bought you flowers
And held your hand
Should’ve gave you all my hours
When I had the chance
Take you to every party
‘Cause all you wanted to do was dance
Now my baby’s dancing
But she’s dancing with another man

My pride, my ego, my needs, and my selfish ways
Caused a good strong woman like you to walk out my life
Now I’ll never, never get to clean up the mess I made, ohh…
And it haunts me every time I close my eyes

It all just sounds like oooooh…
Mmm, too young, too dumb to realize
That I should’ve bought you flowers
And held your hand
Should’ve gave you all my hours
When I had the chance
Take you to every party
‘Cause all you wanted to do was dance
Now my baby’s dancing
But she’s dancing with another man

Although it hurts
I’ll be the first to say that I was wrong
Oh, I know I’m probably much too late
To try and apologize for my mistakes
But I just want you to know

I hope he buys you flowers
I hope he holds your hand
Give you all his hours
When he has the chance
Take you to every party
‘Cause I remember how much you loved to dance
Do all the things I should have done
When I was your man
Do all the things I should have done
When I was your man

Written By: Bruno Mars, Philip Lawrence, Ari Levine and Andrew Wyatt

The Mysterious Disappearance Of The Tinkaboo Dasharoo

Home Office, Workstation, Macbook Air

I have come across an anomaly in my WordPress blog. Does anyone have any idea where the WP Admin dashboard has disappeared to? It used to show in the panel on the left side of my screen, but overnight it seems to have vanished. Yes – vanished! Completely disappeared into thin air. Am I missing a trick?

Is there a new way to find the old tinkaboo dasharoo? It is a very handy aid to searching out my older posts from the Caramel archives and republishing them while I am such a busy bee with work.

If any of you technical genius types could point me in the right direction (and please don’t send me off into one of those awful forums) I would be so grateful to you!

Here I Stand With My Everlasting Love

Marriage, Wedding, Bride, White, Dress

Jim Adams, aka Newepicauthor, the creator of A Unique Title For Me, is hosting SONG-LYRIC-SUNDAY and this week he has chosen a theme that gave Jack the idea to discuss songs for our first dance together after we wed. Thanks Jim!!!

I have been subtly trying to persuade Jack that we can wed on zoom and skip the whole expensive reception side of things. But my beloved wants a big party! He will have to wait though – we are in a pandemic! What a time to be planning a wedding!

One thing we did agree on though is my song choice for today. If you haven’t already noticed, Jim’s SONG LYRIC SUNDAY theme for today is: ENDLESS/ETERNITY/EVERLASTING/FOREVER/INFINITY/OMEGA

It seemed obvious to me to pick “Everlasting Love“. Whenever I choose a song like this, I have to take my pick from all the different artists who have covered it. I try to think back to my first exposure to the song – which version do I remember from my younger days? Well, I immediately identified this cover from Love Affair.

I love this track, it is an unashamed celebration of love. I have always love it for it’s exuberant tone. When love gives you that feeling that you want to party – oh I just love it!

Hearts gone astray, deep in hurt when they go
I went away, just when you, you need me so
You won’t regret, I come back beggin’ you
Won’t you forget, welcome love we once knew

Open up your eyes then you realize
Here I stand with my everlasting love
Need you by my side, girl to be my bride
You’ll never be denied, everlasting love

From the very start, open up your heart
Feel that you’re part of everlasting love

Need a love to last forever
Need a love to last forever

Where life really flows, no one really knows
Till someone’s there to show the way to lasting love
Like the sun it shines, endlessly it shines
You always will be mine, if eternal love

Whenever love went wrong, ours would still be strong
We’d have our very own everlasting love

Need a love to last forever
Need a love to last forever

Open up your eyes then you realize
Here I stand with my everlasting love
Need you by my side, girl to be my bride
You’ll never be denied, everlasting love

From the very start, open up your heart
Be a lasting part of everlasting love
Whenever love went wrong, ours would still be strong
We’ll have our very own everlasting love

Written by: Buzz Cason, Mac Gayden

Tonight

I have been walking home from work this week and noticing the moon grow bigger each evening. Tonight will be a full moon. After sundown it will be Nisan 14 – a deeply significant date.

Moon, Full Moon, Sky, Nightsky, Lunar, Moonlight, View

An incredible escape from cruel slavery occurred on this night. Millions left Egypt after the Passover celebration was established. The Jews were asked to remember that salvation each year.

For centuries people faithfully observed the annual Passover. In the first century, Jesus and his closest followers did so. It was on that occasion when Jesus introduced a meaningful commemoration for his followers. He was about to give up his life as a sacrifice for mankind.

When I was reading through the events that took place on Nisan 14, I noticed that there was one point when Jesus was under such enormous stress that God sent an angel to strengthen him. I wonder what that angel said to Jesus.

There is only one hope to rescue mankind from the cruel slavery of disease and death. One man died that we may live.

In the weeks prior to his death, Jesus was busy. One of the notable events was when he visited his close friends on the loss of their dear brother Lazarus. When Jesus witnessed the grief of those bereaved, he gave way to tears, even though he knew what he was about to do. Shortly afterwards he was empowered to wake Lazarus up from death. Lazarus returned to life.

Soon Jesus will restore life on a vast scale….but in the meantime he sees the grief mankind feel due to disease and death. He knows what he is soon going to do. He gave up his own life to buy back life for Adam’s descendants. Jesus still feels for our plight before that time when he is authorised to act as King of God’s Kingdom.

The meaning of these events of past salvation and the hope they provide for mankind are deeply significant. There is only only one way that mankind can be rescued from death. So tonight we remember.

Puddings And Press-Ups

When I read this post back it brings back so many memories of High School to me. Sometimes I think I paint my English teacher too harshly, but the fact is, he was memorable! We were ok with it. So I know the contents of this post might seem concerning, and I don’t think teachers could get away with this now, but twenty-something years ago we took it on the chin with a grin. Nobody could forget English lessons with the infamous Mr Turner!

Steinbach, Mennonite Heritage Village

Mr Turner was a riddle. There was a very jovial side to him. He clearly had a sense of humour as indicated by his huge guffaws, which made his belly wobble and his face crimson. Yet he had also won the reputation of being one of the most fearsome teachers within the school.

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is dfhgejrog.pngI remember my English lessons during the first year of high school vividly. He would ask a question. If you didn’t have your hand up he was likely to single you out for attention, which was always rather embarrassing. So I quickly learnt it was better to raise my hand, even if I did not have anything to say – and just hope he would not pick me.

It did not always work though!

You,” Mr Turner said as he was looking over in my general direction. I looked around at my classmates sitting around me to see if he could be referring to someone else. “Yes you…you have your hand up. What’s your name girl?

Melody Finch Sir.”

Well come along Finch, speak up, we don’t have all day!”

What was the question again Sir?”

What was the question? Finch, why did you put your hand up if you don’t know what the question was?”

My mind has gone blank Sir.

Finch you are a pudding. A right pudding. What are you?

A pudding Sir.” I could hear some of my classmates sniggering.

That’s right. A real pudding. Can you spell that backwards?

Erm, G-N..erm..E, no I mean I-D” I did know how to spell “pudding”, but under pressure, I struggled to think clearly.

Wrong! I asked you to spell “that” backwards, not “pudding” backwards! Finch you really are a right pudding. Look at me when I am addressing you Finch! Do you know what you are?

A pudding Sir!”

Very good, but you’re a right rum pudding too. I am only teasing you Finch, don’t sulk. Now who can tell Miss Finch what the question was?”

There was silence. Nobody else was willing to hazard a guess. Mr Turner’s stare rested on a boy named Henry Wilson who sat at the back of the classroom. “Wilson! Are you asleep? You look as is you have only just crawled out of bed. Stand up! Shirt! In! Tucked in! Do you own a comb? Tell your parents to buy you a comb so you can straighten your hair in the morning. Don’t scowl Wilson! Come here, bring your exercise book. Come on lad, we don’t have all day!

Although, I felt some relief now that Mr Turner seemed to have forgotten about me momentarily, I felt a sickening anticipation of what was about to happen. Almost every lesson somebody ended up at the front of the classroom. Mr Turner would find some reason to humiliate them in front of the class. In the case of Henry Wilson, it was the dishevelled state of his exercise book. Before long Henry was made to do one hundred press-ups at the front of the classroom with a dictionary on his head. It kept slipping off, and so Mr Turner rested it on his back instead.

It was usually the boys who ended up doing press-ups. None of us escaped being called “puddings”. As a group of students we were divided in our opinion of Mr Turner. I guess in some ways we found his lessons funny, but we all had nervous knots at the same time. He gave me very poor grades for months, until I wrote a very long character study on Ruth Balacki from the book we were studying “The Silver Sword”. He gave me an A and wrote that it was the first time my homework had not sent him to sleep.

I have to admit I was glad to find out that we would have a change of English teacher for my second year at high school. We had Mrs Lawton, who told us she was a humanist and a was very kind and encouraging in general. She taught us English until she ran away with Mr Colbook the games teacher when he moved over Buckinghamshire. But that’s another story.

Jump In The Shower

Workload, Management, Control

Jim Adams, aka Newepicauthor, the creator of A Unique Title For Me, is hosting SONG-LYRIC-SUNDAY and this week he has chosen the theme: HOP/JUMP/LEAP/POUNCE/SPRING

I thought of so many songs for today’s theme I had no idea which one I was going to pick until last night. Work is dominating my thoughts at the moment. A lot is going on. It is hard to switch off to work just right now. Jack is great at getting me to relax and turn off. I am so grateful to him. But some weeks my life seems to be sleep work eat sleep work eat sleep….and so on.

Jack teases me that our uniforms are rather “kinky” – yes Jack, the government want NHS staff to keeping the pulse of the nation’s libido on track so they squeeze us into uniforms that exaggerate our curves. That is why most of us order a uniform at least two sizes too big for us…and end up wearing a tent.

I am going to stop there. But I will share with you one of the tunes that has always helped me when work is stressful. It makes me laugh and it helps me remember, that it is not just us who is stressed. Work tends to do this to people – the big cheeses put pressure on us to reach their targets and we end up in a great tizzy. The amazing Dolly Parton nailed it in this de-stressor of a song! Thank you Dolly for penning the ultimate workplace anthem.

Tumble outta bed
And I stumble to the kitchen
Pour myself a cup of ambition
And yawn and stretch
And try to come to life

Jump in the shower
And the blood starts pumpin’
Out on the street
The traffic starts jumpin’
The folks like me on the job from 9 to 5

Workin’ 9 to 5,
What a way to make a livin’
Barely gettin’ by
It’s all takin’ and no givin’
They just use your mind
And they never give you credit
It’s enough to drive you crazy
If you let it

9 to 5, for service and devotion
You would think that I
Would deserve a fair promotion
Want to move ahead
But the boss won’t seem to let me
I swear sometimes that man is out to get me

They let you dream
Just to watch ’em shatter
You’re just a step
On the boss-man’s ladder
But you got dreams
He’ll never take away

You’re in the same boat
With a lot of your friends
Waitin’ for the day your ship’ll come in
‘N’ the tide’s gonna turn
And it’s all gonna roll your way

Workin’ 9 to 5
What a way to make a livin’
Barely gettin’ by
It’s all takin’ and no givin’
They just use your mind
And you never get the credit
It’s enough to drive you crazy
If you let it

9 to 5, yeah
They got you where they want you
There’s a better life
And you think about it, don’t you?
It’s a rich man’s game
No matter what they call it
And you spend your life
Puttin’ money in his wallet

9 to 5, whoa
What a way to make a livin’
Barely gettin’ by
It’s all takin’ and no givin’
They just use your mind
And they never give you credit
It’s enough to drive you crazy
If you let it

9 to 5, yeah
They got you where they want you
There’s a better life
And you dream about it, don’t you?
It’s a rich man’s game
No matter what they call it
And you spend your life
Puttin’ money in his wallet

Working 9 to 5

Written by: Dolly Parton

There Is No “I” In Team

Doctor, Patient, Clinic, Consultation

I keep on thinking about work. I am in a good place mentally about work at the moment. It can be extremely stressful and demanding at times, but right now, I am coping just fine with that. That’s not always the way. Some weeks, I am so exhausted I come home and curl up wishing that I never ever had to go back there.

Some times, I feel as if I end up doing all the least popular tasks. I don’t mind. I really don’t mind what I do at work. We are all part of a team. I have felt as if some of my teammates were just so stressed and under so much pressure more and more was being left for me to do. I am happy to sort out all the time-consuming, faffy, frustrating tasks and get paperwork finished off so the decks are cleared.

But over time, it has felt as if some of the team began to view it as my job to sort out the rubbishy tasks. I still don’t mind doing those tasks. But what I don’t like the idea is any of the team feeling there is some pecking order and they take on the more “glamourous” tasks. I don’t think anyone is doing it. But I do sometimes notice a spirit of “this is your job and that is my job”, whereas the truth for the most part is that we all need to be able to multi-task and be willing to do whatever is asked of us. Not completing tasks sometimes makes it harder for someone else to come along and work out what we have done and not done and fill in the gaps without a clue.

It’s not really a big issue….it’s just….the way I see it is that we are a team. I don’t believe in individual glory at all. I believe that as a team we work together. All have strengths, all have weaknesses. All are working hard. Some are particularly effective in tasks that mean we meet targets. My boss has sometimes singled me out because of the “results” I obtain in some areas. I feel uncomfortable with that, partly because of having a dislike to personal praise. But partly because I don’t want others to feel discouraged. I don’t want competition amongst the team. I perceive the team as a group of humans, with hearts, that might be close to breaking.

Doctor, Nurse, Healthcare, Hospital

We all have good days and bad days. We all need to be aware that sometimes our colleagues need a little more kindness, or more understanding. When we are tired, we get whingy and start to feel as if the odds are stacked against us, or we are working harder than everyone else.

I don’t know….I just love the people I work with. We have been under so much pressure and so much stress. But for me….I don’t think wages or glory compensate for kindness and love. Some of my colleagues might not see things that way. Some want a lot more than 1% as a reward for all their hard work. Others want to be given praise and verbal appreciation or perhaps promotion. We all want to feel needed. Everyone is needed. We just are different. As a team we are especially amazing. For most of the past year there has been a tremendously supportive spirit amongst the team. I want that to stay. I don’t want anyone to feel undervalued and unappreciated.

That’s one of the reasons why I guess I am happy to take on the rubbishy tasks – because that’s my way of saying to my teammates – you do the work you find more rewarding, I’ll do those annoying tasks no one seems to want to do. I’ll do them because they are part of the work we do as a team. They may be rubbishy….but we have to make sure they are completed as a team. But I am not doing them to win praise for doing rubbishy tasks. I am doing them because we are a team – and I want the team to be happy and enjoy their work. I don’t want anyone to dread coming to work, I don’t want anyone to go home feeling bitter. I want all to know that as a collective – we are really really remarkable – we have been all year.

Reminiscing

Beach, Beautiful, Blonde, Enjoyment, Female, Girl

For the past couple of months, I have been re-blogging some of my older posts. There are a lot left….but I wondered would it confuse you if I republished some of older posts about the gorgeous Goldfinch? They are special to me. He and I are still in touch you know. We had a little flurry of emails on Sunday.

I know sometimes re-blogging personal posts sometimes can cause confusion, but just to make it clear – I am with Jack – we are engaged. But Goldfinch and I are still friends and he will always be special to me. I would love to reminisce over all those happy memories I wrote about. But I am struggling to find time to get back to all the comments that are stacking up on my blog – so please if I do re-publish older posts about Goldfinch – please don’t send me questions about what has happened to Jack!

Jack is super smashing great! We have these bizarre conversations about weddings. I still think it is too early to plan. I don’t even want to book a holiday to Norfolk I am so doubtful about cancellations and more messing about as things open up. But Jack is wonderful. He is making me so happy. So much of pain just melts away when peace is restored. It’s weird I can now talk about the past without the pain rising.