I worked on this post over several days, in my leisure time…something that will make sense by the end of this post 🙂
I have had a busy week, with Jack and then a lot of work to catch up with. But I really wanted to work on a post in response to the questions from Dr Tanya, the creator of Salted Caramel, who has asked some more great questions about blogging. Take a look at Dr Tanya’s original post below:
https://saltedcaramel670.wordpress.com/2019/10/15/what-does-blogging-cost-to-your-personal-life/
Cost of Blogging — Questions
Does it infringe upon your leisure time?
Erm…well, I wouldn’t say “infringe”.
Generally, I would use my leisure time to socialize with friends. One of the reasons I wanted to be back in London is the social life outside of work. I have many dear friends here in London. Of course, recently a special someone has snapped up most of my leisure time.
When I am back in the little nest on my own, and have finished my house-work etc, I can choose how to relax before it’s time to go to sleep. There isn’t much on television I would enjoy, so normally I would turn on my lap-top and check my e-mails and write to family and friends, or phone someone I wanted to chat with.
I often use time in the evening to read other posts from other bloggers. But I have found there are so many posts there, I can’t get through them if I only check my WP Reader once a day. So I also check my Reader in the morning when I am eating breakfast and drinking coffee, and also when I am having a lunch break.
Writing posts is a whole different matter. Two days a week, I only work in the afternoon, So I usually am at home in the morning doing housework. So after I have done what I need to do, I sit down and write posts – numerous posts. During those two mornings I will write several shorter posts and work on longer posts (like award posts, or parts of my Annabelle Riley story). I then schedule those posts to be published at other times. Occasionally I find myself with other leisure time at other times in the week and can type up a short post.
Because I have such a huge catalogue of content in the e-mails I have sent to friends and family, it speeds things up massively that I can copy and paste and then edit my post to make it suitable for blogging. It speeds up writing enormously.
Worse still, does it distract you from your work/studies?
Nope. Work, both unpaid and paid, is more important than blogging. I have been trained that work is work. You give work your best.
I work around forty – fifty hours a week on average, although my hours vary…some work for money, to pay my rent etc and some work on a voluntary basis in connection with the charities I work with. All the work I do receives my full attention. I don’t use phones or laptops for any personal use (with the exception of when I am cooking – it is nice to listen to music when I am cooking, and when things are in the oven, I might be able to do other things, such as reading posts on WordPress).
Is it taking a toll on your personal relationships?
My family and friends are very important to me. I spend time with them, or communicating with them, frequently and regularly. Often it is the e-mails I have sent to family and friends that form the basis for posts I publish on CRUSHED CARAMEL.
Blogging is something I do when I am on my own. The reading I do before bedtime. The writing I do those two mornings when I wouldn’t be out socialising.
Has your health suffered?
Since I received head injuries (when I was the victim of a crime some years ago) I have not been able to spend my leisure time the same way as I used to.
In the past I played basketball, went to a boot-camp, ran at least three times a week (one eight mile run and two four mile runs) and I did a huge amount of socialising. I was travelling all over London and beyond to parties and live music events. I was going away almost every weekend to stay with friends, and trying to squeeze in lots of hiking and cycling and anything active and outdoorsy – climbing trees, wild swimming, sports days – I loved anything energetic.
I miss that lifestyle. Having to rest could easily drive me crazy. I need things to keep my mind busy.
But I am not able to do what I used to. I still have a healthy social life. I like to make sure I spend two or three evenings (or other times) out with friends (or indoors with friends). But I need more rest than I used to. I have crazy headaches at times, and I also have black-outs and difficulties breathing at times.
So, I needed restful things to do in my leisure time. My life-long habit is writing letters and e-mails. I have a lot of material in my e-mail accounts that I can adapt to posts for my blog. I also have been writing a book for my little niece. Blogging is something I can do while I am resting. I have found it very enjoyable.
Have you gained weight?
Since I stopped doing all the sport I used to I have gained some weight. But that is not due to blogging.
I have gained some weight because since I was attacked, I have not been able to maintain the level of activity I did before. That’s because of the head injuries I received. The problem I have had is my brain not always telling my heart to beat faster. I am fine with walking, and swimming. But when I tried running (I used to love running!), I kept blacking out.
Do you ever get writer’s block?
The challenges to my writing are not so much ideas, it is more the effect of headaches. When I wake up my head is a brute! It can take me a while to be able to function properly. But the wonderful combination of ibuprofen and coffee normally aid my writing capabilities.
Well…some mornings I might not necessarily have any fresh ideas. But my drafts folder has posts that I have previously started when I had an idea but not time to develop it. So if I am ever short of ideas, it’s great to just peruse my drafts folder and pick something to work on.
Have you ever suffered from blog related stress or blogger burn out?
Hardly any. I accept that there is a limit to how much time I have (as do we all). Blogging should be enjoyable. If I cannot get through every single post that appears in my WP Reader…so be it. I hope I will live to read more another day!
We all have different circumstances and situations. We all juggle different responsibilities and obligations. Blogging should be something recreational (unless you are making a business out of it, or secretly trying to take over the world). So if it ever feels like a burden, maybe it is time to make a slight adjustment or be more reasonable about your limitations.
I respect all bloggers are doing what they want, what they can, what they enjoy. I would hope they are prioritising on spending time with family, friends, their work and their health. I would not want anyone to suffer because of losing balance. I especially look out for the posts that appear from bloggers who publish infrequently. It’s always quite exciting to see their posts. I think I make more effort to comment as well on their posts to encourage them.
I try to read almost everything from the bloggers I follow, because I appreciate their support. But it is clearly something I just would not enjoy at all, I might skip it. As with any other area of entertainment, I am selective. My mind is not a sewer. I won’t let just anything flow through it!
Blogging should be fun! Don’t let it be stressful! To keep it fun, never forget what really matters in life! Family, friends, work, your health!! Your life should be many shades of wonderful…and if you have some spare time, sit down write a gorgeous post and share it with us! Forget about your worries and strife over blogging – look after the bear necessities and enjoy! Have fun!!!
I came back from Australia with all these wonderful things I want to tell you about my trip there and my time with Goldfinch, and yet for some strange reason I still have not really sat down to write about what was one of the highlights of my life! I was sooooooo happy there with him!!! It’s all stored up in my mind and heart and I am sure it will eventually leak out into my posts. I think I have selfishly been enjoying the euphoria and contentment he breathed into me, before I share it with the WordPress world. Perhaps in someways in my head, I am still over there with him 🙂
Instead something else has been occupying my attention. You may have noticed that I responded to a writing prompt from Kim, the creator of 
I have not published anything for the last few days because I really wanted to make sure I concentrated on how to finish this story. I have grown to care so much about that happens to Annabelle. She is not going to have a Disney princess ending, I promise you that. But I am going to finish her story on a positive. Why on earth would we want to read anything with a miserable ending? I now know how it’s going to go! It feels great to know what is going to happen. I have three more posts scheduled for next week. Then I am going to give my attention to the grand finale!
I was very nervous about a long project. Personally I think blogging on WordPress is more suited to shorter posts, entertaining or interesting or just plain delightful posts. I didn’t think anyone would have an interest in me focusing attention a long story about a fictional character. But it turns out that’s what most of us have been reading for donkey’s years!
…and I have lost track of how many lovely comments I have received encouraging me to keep on developing Annabelle’s story! But thank you so much to everyone who has given me the impetus to continue. It’s one of the most satisfying things I have done since I started blogging. I am looking forward to tweaking the last few parts so that they nicely tie up the story lines for Annabelle and the other characters in her story.
I am afraid that I might be upsetting a few of the bloggers who have kindly supported my posts. Perhaps I am coming across as neglectful or indifferent about other wonderful bloggers. So this post is to ask anyone who thinks I am overlooking them and not being courteous as a blogger to drop me a message to tell me. (lol – I may live to regret it! I am not asking for those messages where you demand that I follow your blog!!!) I am feeling as if I have totally fallen behind with all aspects of blogging due to my trip to Australia. Now, that is not something I worry about too much, because frankly, blogging is supposed to be fun. I am not going to beat myself up too much.
But I can see a considerable number of likes and follows from bloggers I do not recognise at all. So I wanted to say right now that I am a not a great blogger at all, I admit. I like to work on posts, some in response to prompts and some just about putting my own thoughts into words, but I am not in this for numbers or statistics. I don’t have any ambitions whatsoever regarding my blogging or writing in general.
If you are new to Crushed Caramel, I am publishing a mix of posts about my life, family, friends, the man I love (Goldfinch) and the occasional works of fiction or even bad poetry. I try to keep things positive, light-hearted and family friendly.
I certainly do not automatically follow everyone who likes or follows my posts. My WP Reader would be a nightmare if I did. And if I can see that you publish twenty posts everyday there is no way I am going to follow you. But I like bloggers who are nice people and I like to see posts that are happy, positive, interesting, fun, creative, thought-provoking, beautiful etc. So if you are one of those lovely types who wants to contribute to a friendly blogging community and who writes posts that make readers feel good about being alive, then oh definitely do drop me a link to your posts.
Today is my one day of rest in this busy fortnight where I am working thirteen out of fourteen days 😦 and yet somehow I have managed to promise I will run errands for my landlady and make hummus and crudites for her. I seem to spend an inordinate amount of time chopping up carrots, peppers, celery and cucumber. Well, I have promised, so I will keep my word.
It was a rather random choice as a result of brainstorming with a friend. I think my blog-name may have caused confusion because the first dozen bloggers who followed my site were foodie bloggers. But I do like caramel very much.
We had a bit of a laugh brain storming over different names, but he suggested Caramel, because sometimes he has used that as a pet name for me. Actually he tends to call me Caramel Betty. He always said he could never understand how Jack could have been so careless with someone so sweet and who is such a softie.
Be patient.
Enjoy the party!
Years ago I had to walk home from high school (which was about four miles from our home) when we had a snow storm and the school buses could not run because of the roads. (That’s what happens in England when it snows – we are a bit pathetic!)
Mum told her to wait in our house until Dad came home from work and then he would make sure she reached home safely and in the meantime my mum telephoned her mum. Then Mum made us some delicious veggie soup and hot toast lathered with melting butter. I always remember how it felt to have that meal after we had been so bitterly cold.
I have found Teresa extremely encouraging and a source of great practical advice. To me she is an exemplary blogger. The quality of Teresa’s own writing is superb, but also for the huge contribution she has made to other bloggers – I think she is top of the list of super-bloggers for me.
Joyful
Besides Goldfinch?
I try not to get too attached to possessions.
The human element. I am a people person. I love the other people who are blogging. The wonderful personalities and the different points of view, pastimes, passions reflected by the many bloggers out there.
There are a lot of posts on my site that I have really enjoyed putting together. Some of them I like to look back at and I really enjoy reading about the members of family or friends or special experiences I have had.
Lots of people say they like my voice but have difficulty placing my accent. There is a little of the Liverpool accent (and sometimes I use expressions that seem to be only used in Liverpool) and a little of the broader Lancashire accent and a twang of Australian (my mum’s family are Australian) but I speak in a very clear English style. The tone of my voice is fairly soft and rhythmic. Many tell me to speak up because they cannot hear me when I speak at my natural volume. Some of my friends say they could listen to my voice droning all day because it calms them down. That has really helped when I have had to deal with aggressive patients while working in healthcare. I seem to calm them down just by speaking even if I am just talking about the weather, they seem distracted by my voice.
I love ironing (almost as much as karaoke!)
Candles scare me. In the town I grew up in there were a lot of deadly house fires due to accidents with candles or cigarette stubs that had not been extinguished properly. The houses on the council estate I grew up on would burn up like cardboard. Whole families have been lost in some of the fires that occurred. Very upsetting. Whenever anyone gives me candles as a gift, I give them away to someone else, normally a charity shop.
 
I am originally from the North of England. I grew up on the outskirts of Liverpool. We were actually almost equal distance between Liverpool and Manchester. But it was Liverpool people that lived there. Our family home was on a council estate. It almost felt like a giant Butlins camp – poor quality housing and loads of kids running round. There were lots of families in the town, because it was built in the 1960/70s as an overflow for Liverpool. Lots of families moved in as the houses were so much more affordable.
The North-West of England has a lot of industrial towns and I used to feel overwhelmed with the urban industrial scenes I saw regularly. Some parts of our town were dilapidated, some vandalized and littered. I always wished I lived somewhere that felt more picturesque and cleaner. However, our town was surrounded by beautiful countryside and farms. I started to explore the countryside around our town in my late teens, and realized how very beautiful it was. Just a few minutes walk from our family home was almost like paradise.
Currently I live in London. I have lived in several different parts of London. I live in an area now that feels fairly safe. There is a large green park at the end of my road. I could not survive in London if it were not for the green parks that are dotted around. Around the corner from my little nest, there are many restaurants and shops. It can be very busy here, especially at the weekend. But it is very quiet for me down here in my little abode.
Since my head injuries – mornings are horrible! HORRIBLE! Until my pain-killers kick in, I am a wreck. I mentioned in another post that for a long time I have been able to just take pain killers once a day, first thing in the morning, which I am pleased about.
However, neither am I a night owl. I am normally pretty shattered by the time I reach the little nest after a busy day out and about in London. I long to be in bed of an evening. I love the feeling of slipping into bed and drifting away into sleep.
Ooooo-er I am not sure how to answer this as I am not sure what the question means. You are going to have to help me out with this one. I have just read another blogger’s post where they said their birthstone was a ruby. However, they did not explain what that meant. I do like sapphires and diamonds. But that is mainly because I like blue…and sapphires look amazing with diamonds.
I don’t watch or read much fantasy. I enjoy fictional stories, but i like them set in the real world, rather than a fantasy world.
Nowadays, if I could go anywhere, it would be a part of this amazing planet we live on, which I think is probably far better than anything we could imagine ourselves. I find this planet makes me incredibly excited and inspires within me a huge desire to explore.
If I am on my own, then I just make a snack to eat. I don’t normally cook when it is just me. But my fridge always has salad, home-made hummus, pesto, fresh pasta and home made veggie soups. I always have a variety of different crispbreads in the cupboard. I have avocados too. So it is easy and quick to rustle up a snack for myself. I don’t like having a heavy meal in the evening.
I have always loved working on construction sites. I find ground-works hard going now though. You have to be strong for all the heavy work. When I was younger I loved digging trenches and helping to prepare the footings for a concrete foundation. But just the thought of that right now makes me feel tired! I love roof tiling and plaster-boarding. I love all the work painting and decorating too.
I love working outdoors. I have worked as a gardener and I loved it, but I needed a lot of supervision because I didn’t have much knowledge. I became quite the expert with the drive-on lawn mower. But I would love to have proper training as a gardener, so that I had more confidence.
I have been writing long letters and e-mails to friends since I can remember. So I think that letter writing, with a personal touch to people I care about, is a life-long habit.
But it was Stuart who kept on saying I should start blogging. I didn’t know what blogging was at that point. Stuart helped me a lot. More than I think he realizes. This may sound strange, but I moved to this part of London to be nearer to Stuart, but it did not work out. I think timing had a lot to do with it. I still was struggling with men after being attacked. I feel bad, but at the end of the day, I was not the one who pulled out, Stuart was. I wanted it to be him that made me happy to be a woman. But I think at the time it was too much pressure for both of us.
Some time later a friend, who has been blogging for a long time, helped me to set up this site on WordPress. He suggested publishing some of the stories I had of how I have embarrassed myself over the years. He thought “lessons in life” could be the main theme of my site. I think from the start I knew I wanted to write about the events that had crushed me in previous years. But I also felt strongly that it would be exhausting for me and readers if every post was about challenges. I didn’t want anyone to think of Crushed Caramel as depressing, negative laments. I wanted to enjoy blogging and I really wanted others to enjoy what I came up with.
I am really thrilled that the writing prompts and challenges created by other bloggers have given me many opportunities to produce light-hearted fun posts that balance out my site. I feel better about having the occasional post about some of the things that have made me heavy-hearted at times.
My own favourite post is a poem I wrote twenty years ago:
If I am restricted to five…well I was showing Goldfinch a commercial advert for Warburton’s Giant Crumpets the other day…it has the Muppets doing a musical extravaganza. So so funny. Can you imagine having dinner with Kermit, Miss Piggy, Gonzo, Fozzie Bear and Animal?!!! That would be the experience of a life-time! I can imagine the conversation being extremely memorable! Although I really would not want to sit next to Animal.
      
     
Hmm…my sisters and I were competitive swimmers for years. I love swimming. Being in a pool feels wonderful to me…peace, calm, happy place…and then as I swim up and down for an hour or two I feel adrenaline and power rushing through my limbs. I am finding it hard with my current schedule to go regularly though. The habit I would like to make a regular feature of my life is to go swimming at least once a week.
After we have finished building a boat, Goldfinch and I set sail away into the deep blue. We would travel to every port and harbour and we would meet the people who lived locally, taste their cuisine, dance to their music, and explore their culture. We would visit every land on the planet. There would also be plenty of swimming and diving when we were out a sea. We would walk hand in hand along many beaches watching the magnificent sunsets. There would be no such thing as passports and visas. Just love!!!
Caramel 