I am gazing up at you and feeling like I desperately need to talk to a friend who knows me inside and out. I need a friend who can see what is going on in this heart of mine when I cannot find the words. I need a friend who will listen and understand and empathize. I need a friend who knows this pain and has words of comfort and wise advise to offer.
I am feeling so very small, and a little lost. But I know you are more magnificent than all the works of your hand. In all these years, this heart of mine has gone on beating, and I am amazed that I breathe in and out without thinking. I am in awe of countless miracles around me.
Things are changing around me at a pace that frightens me. I suddenly am unsure which step to take next. I am consumed with the heartbreaks of those I love. There are sinister characters that lurk on the edge of my life, using their vicious little fingers to spread slander and malicious gossip about me….again….for no other reason that I am going to marry a very fine man. They don’t like it. They don’t know me, but they want to hurt me.
I cling to him, for he is my greatest treasure. Our story is one that fills me with faith and hope, for I have already voyaged stormy seas and seen my timbers shipwrecked, and yet you rescued and restored me, and made sure I was sea-worthy once more. But the fear is still there, perhaps heightened by the memories of that darkness.
That feeling that I am just a tiny insignificant pebble, and yet, you in all your majesty, lower yourself down to my level to hear my heartache. You are more wonderful than all the mountains and forests and oceans and all of the vast heavens above. You take note of all the suffering of those who long for goodness to fill this earth. You hold their prayers as deeply precious.
Time is passing, the grains are falling away, the pages are turning, the scenes are racing by….just a little while longer….and these fears will have passed, these fears will be no more.
Caramel 