What Would You Say To Encourage Someone?

I have scheduled this post to be published early in the morning….but I will only have chance to read any comments this evening. But I have a big scary day today – INTERVIEW (AAAAAAAGHH!) – and so I am wondering if I may kindly ask you a favour.

What would you say to someone who faces a disappointment?

A failure?

A rejection?

I don’t know for certain that will be the outcome….however, I am sure there is a lot of interest for this role, and I am also sure there will be other candidates with more qualifications than I. So frankly, I would be pleasantly astonished if I was selected!

I have a feeling that by Monday evening, after the interview is over, I will feel a little downhearted, so I am hoping so much you may have been able to share a few words that you would impart to someone to cheer them up after a disappointment. I would be so grateful…xx

I will make sure Monday evening is a chill out time – I know there will be a sense of relief to have the interview out of the way.

47 thoughts on “What Would You Say To Encourage Someone?”

    1. Thank you so much Irene – you are so kind!!!
      My confidence has been very low about this interview. I am putting it down to Pandemic exhaustion and also the fact I am applying for a job for which although I have nearly ten years experience, I have not worked in that field for a number of years. I feel as if it is obvious I am not up to date.
      But I am trying to be positive and hope they see potential in any desirable qualities which I do hope they can detect.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much.
      I remember hearing something when I was a little girl about doing your best. A guy I remember clearly was called Ian. He said to me, “if I told you I wanted you to run a marathon, and you went out and ran for as long as you could, until your legs collapsed beneath you, whether you had completed the marathon or not, you would have done your best”. But then he said to me, “if I told you I wanted you to run a marathon, and you went out and started training, asking others for advice and tips, changed your diet and regime, and consistently applied yourself….and then after all of that effort you went out and tried to complete the marathon, and you ran for as long as you could, until your legs collapsed, whether you had completed the marathon or not….well in that case, you would have done your utmost.”

      I was about seven when he said that to me. I looked at him in amazement. He said to me, in life there will be plenty of occasions when you can either do your best, or you can do your utmost. I have never forgotten that.

      So since I was invited to this interview, I have been ringing friends and asking them for tips, researching the field on professional websites to try to update my knowledge (I have been absent from this field for some years) and asking friends and family to share with me their experiences in interviews. I have also been trying to keep my spirits up by singing more and asking myself why this role would make a difference to me now, what positive experiences I have gained in work and in life that could be desirable to an employer. I have also asked my current boss for advice and she has been great, she has given me so much encouragement.

      I feel better about it now. I know that I might feel as if my legs are going to collapse underneath me, but I have done what I can to show I appreciate this opportunity and I am willing to put in the effort and learn from others to be as effective and successful as possible.

      If my legs do collapse, I can be so grateful for everyone who has helped me along this journey and the benefits of this preparation process.

      Liked by 2 people

        1. I am counting on the Maker of the Universe helping me to keep doing what is right and good no matter what circumstances or situation I am in….until He brings about the kind of changes we long for.

          Liked by 1 person

  1. in the past, I saw each interview as a learning experience, even if I didn’t get the job, but it made me better in the next one. either way, you’ve taken a step toward something you want, and did not sit idle and wish you did. bravo for that

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    1. I think I have a rocky history when it comes to job applications and interviews.
      When I left school, I ended up going to recruitment agencies and temping. I was just plonked into graduate positions and learned through on the job experience. I was so focused on my career in volunteering, I resisted all the pressure to be promoted because I knew those roles would take up more of my time. I was content to remain in the same role for many years and I made it my own. I ended up writing the company policies in several areas.
      Then when I moved across the country, I struggled to find a similar job because I had not done any educational training, I only had on the job experience (which did not seem to count for anything without having a degree). But that is when I was randomly offered a job as a cook. That opened up my eyes to all the ways there are to earn your own living when you are self-employed. I loved that time of my life. Then I was invited to be an international volunteer – which was the dream of my heart.
      It was only after I was attacked and had to recover that I faced the prospect of interviews again. I was still traumatised by what happened, and I did not find any it easy to go to interviews. I went to one interview all dressed up and was horrified when two security guards seized my handbag. I ended up in a group interview, everyone else wearing jeans or tracksuits. The interviewer was not asking questions. He was making clear their rules. No going to the bathroom while you are on your shift. You can only use the bathroom during your lunch break. You should have seen my face!! I asked him several questions and eventually he said he could see very clearly that I did not belong there. Yes….he was 100% right!!!
      When I did return to London, I had some challenges, but eventually, and almost miraculously I ended up working for the NHS. I had to call the interviewer and tell them I had arrived at the railway station and my train was cancelled, and the next train was two hours later. Well, we had a good chat over the phone, and she told me after she hired me that she enjoyed the conversation so much she just knew that she wanted me on her team.
      So the whole area of interviews is completely….what is the word?….”abstract” to me!!!

      Liked by 2 people

  2. I would say that if you don’t get it… then it wasn’t meant to be but that everything happens for a reason and this just means that better things are waiting for you in the future. Good luck though. 😊🀞

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    1. Thanks Kianna, I like to think that whatever the outcome, they will select the person who fits in with their team and their outlook best. If its not me…that’s ok…I will rely on Jack and all my lovely friends to cheer me up.

      Liked by 1 person

        1. lol – I am saying that now. If I am told I was rejected I am sure I will still want to have myself a little cry. It’s never fun to be told it is a no. Still…I know I will be just fine. I have survived things a heck of a lot tougher than a job interview – right! Does not make the interview process easier.

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  3. We all know you are a superstar, so if you did not get the job, it just means the interviewer did not give you the chance to shine. Sometimes an interview is too short a glimpse. I think if they could see more, they would be in no doubt of the kind of contribution you would offer.

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  4. Interviews can be scary, but whatever the outcome, view it as experience gained that will contribute to your interview for a job that is more suited to you (and you to them).

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    1. It is nail-biting!!! I am so grateful for your encouragement. I know that so far…I have been successful in most of the jobs I have had.
      I worked as a cook – nobody died.
      I worked in healthcare – well….I guess I can’t make the same claim as my career as a cook.
      I worked in painting and decorating…I seemed to end up with more paint on me than the walls, and yet everyone told me that my work was immaculate.
      I worked in accounts – perhaps more testament to my accounting and negotiating skills is being able to afford to live on an ludicrously expensive street with multi-millionaires and work part time.
      You see….there are things there that make me a decent employee – I just hope they see the potential!!!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Darling, I know you are worried that you might not have enough experience and that you feel under-qualified. I hope they see the potential in you. You are incredibly intelligent and capable of learning and excelling in any field you work with – you have proven that over and over. They may have other candidates who are up to speed, but I hope they see how bright you are and your marvellous communication skills.

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    1. lol – I am too polite to annoy you with a contortion of your name you won’t be happy with!!
      But thank you Wills, I am lacking in confidence for some reason. I think the Pandemic has wiped me out.

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  6. What’s with the failure/rejection bit? Congrats if you get it, (as long as it’s what you really want.) If you don’t it wasn’t meant to be.
    Would it make you feel better if I said I was going to ask you to review one of my books on your blog, but I’m still procrastinating? Probably not but cyber hugs can help whatever the outcome. πŸ˜€

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I think perhaps I am being plucky in some respects in applying for a job that will be very popular, when I know it is a long time since I worked in that field. I do have ten years relevant experience, but then a gap in which I have worked in other fields.
      I keep meaning to go back to my Caramel’s Corner Reviews. It was something I was enjoying. I have a list of writers who I have promised to review. It has been over a year since I wrote any reviews, and they were not very professional. But it is so kind of you to think of me. It is something I found rather enjoyable.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I saw your hospital on the news the other day. I am interested in jobs where I am not on my feet for so many hours that I can barely make it home. But other than that, I am not too fussy at the moment.

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  7. Interviews are soooooooo stressful. But so are jobs!
    If you don’t get this one, you will find another job that suits you, but whichever one you get – there will be a mix of enjoyment and stress. Don’t put too much weight on whether you are chosen for this job. Jobs are never perfect. But it sounds as if there is a reason you are applying…so whatever reason that is, I hope the solution is provided.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. What you say is so true Zoe. If the interview tells me that the job is going to be scary, it is a good sign that I may have avoided a trap. There are lots of jobs and lots of workers…it can be very hard to find a perfect match, but I have a feeling that we gravitate to an environment in which we can feel satisfied and hopefully we can thrive.

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  8. I’m a bit rubbish with finding the right words, but whether the interviewer sees it or not, you are one amazing human being. Don’t take rejection as a kick in the teeth. But you never know, you might get it and then this comment will be OTT. So I will stop there. Are you going to tell us if you got it?

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    1. lol – the editor says he is rubbish with words. I am having a confidence crisis with this interview. I can’t reason it away for some reason. But when it comes to my value as a human being, I like to think my Dad knew what he was talking about!
      I will tell you the outcome…of course…but I might give myself some time to come to terms with it. Once I am over the trauma, if will probably be good for me to write about it.

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Failure and disappointment and rejection are good because they give you a chance to start over but this is in a better way because it’s not from scratch but from experience that u will begin …hence I think it’s good to face those moments …..we may fear them but they are a blessing in disguise.

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