My nearest neighbour is obviously enjoying the pleasant spring weather we are having.
I see him more and more. Now that the evenings are lighter. he greets me whenever I come home.
Have you noticed more birdsong than normal? I don’t know whether the birds are singing more than they usually do, or whether I can hear them more clearly because there is so much less traffic on the road. Birdsong is one of the sounds I relish each day.
It reminds me of a verse I embedded on my heart when I made the decision to reject full-time work and a university education. I always wondered how I would be able to afford to be a volunteer and live on a part-time wage.
Stop being anxious about your lives as to what you will eat or what you will drink, or about your bodies as to what you will wear. Does not life mean more than food and the body than clothing? Observe intently the birds of heaven; they do not sow seed or reap or gather into storehouses, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth more than they are? – Matt 6:25,26
For five years I did not earn any wages at all. I had basic accommodation and meals. I did not miss any of the things money can buy. There were wonderful wonderful things in life. Wonderful people. Wonderful experiences.
Aaaaah – sigh! I wish I could write more, but I am sleepy after a long day at work. Goodnight. Remember to listen out for the birdsong tomorrow.
Did I ever make things difficult for you? Did I say I would be busy when you wanted to come over? Did I complain that you were coming to late for my liking? Was I grumpy when you came because I wanted to be asleep? Did I grumble because you made me change my plans? Did I forget to tell you how glad I was to see you? Did I forget to change the sheets when I knew you were coming over? Did I forget to put out fresh towels for you? Did I forget to go shopping and buy your favourite juice and snacks? Did I forget to wear my sexiest lingerie?
No. No, I didn’t do any of those things – did I? That was because I was always always afraid it might be the last time you would ever hold me in your arms. I was always overjoyed that you were fond of me and wanted to be with me. I was always eager to make sure you wanted to come back again. I was always overawed at the wonderful man you are.
If you think back, I am sure you will see, I never did take you for granted, and I never will take you for granted. I am in love with a love most ardent, a love most true. I am suddenly terrified I will never see you again, and I really don’t know what to do!
This is why we should not be apart. Because despite the distance, I still ache for you.
For the first time I have come home feeling really tired physically. I had to start earlier and I ended up having to do work I would not normally be expected to do. It was very physical. I had to remember all of my manual handling training. But this evening, it’s that “I can feel every muscle in my body throbbing” kind of tiredness.
Therefore, I am going to have a delicious dinner and…a lovely relaxing bath and…smother myself with my lavender sleepy lotion and…put my fleecy pyjamas on and…watch “Masterchef” and…go to bed.
Sounds like a great plan – does it not!
Don’t ask me to deny what is ingrained in me. Don’t ask me to suppress the core of me, the love that is carved upon my soul, the feelings that ripple within, the passion that has welled up and caused me to blossom.
You have seeped into every part of my being. I am what I am because of the way you have inclined me. Seasons of joy and fond affection with you have made me lush and verdant for everyone else to find shade.
But it was always you who fed me from the roots. It was always you who made my heart beat. You caused me to grow strong and proud. Without you I would be lost in a forest. But you have made me mighty, the admiration of many.
Don’t ask me to forget you…for there is no forgetting what is ingrained within one’s very core.