Oh I did not want to go to work today! Paid work that is. I was not in the mood for it at all. I was right to feel that way. On numerous occasions, I felt like saying, “just because you have eaten too much, drunk too much, spent too much and argued with your nearest and dearest too much – please do not come here and take out all of your frustration on me!”
Anyway, I survived work! Ten hours of work! Not once did I say what I was thinking. Instead I smiled serenely at all of our patients and calmly explained what they needed to do next.
In between obnoxious outbursts from clearly unhappy patients, I closed my eyes and thought about my wonderful family. We didn’t eat too much. There was no alcohol. We burnt off the calories everyday by running after the kids. There were no arguments at all. We didn’t spend too much money because we don’t do decorations or gifts. We just make the most of the time off work to be together. As every day with my family tends to be – it was very joyful.
Love, joy and peace do not come from things, whether they are shiny or sparkly, nor food, whether sweet or savoury. Love, joy and peace come from making sure everyday is about giving to the people you come into contact with. Giving a smile, a kind word, a thank you, a forgiving spirit, a compliment, a listening ear, some support, a funny joke or a host of other things that brighten their day and lighten their load. Love, joy and peace have nothing to do with the great commercial materialistic event that was last week.
Now I back at my little nest recovering from a demanding day at work, I am bracing myself for another long day at work tomorrow, after which I will travel to the other side of London to see Jack. So excited!!!
What will next year bring for “Jack” and me?
Jack has an event early in January, at which I will be making my first “public” appearance alongside him. Sick with nerves? Oh yes! But I am keeping my focus on how much I love Jack. It am anxious about the challenges that will come. It’s not pleasant to be at the mercy of opinionated comments from strangers. My main strategy to deal with it is going to be simply not to look. I am just going to keep my rose-tinted loving outlook.
It’s going to be hard for him to make that kind of decision. I don’t want to pressure him in any way. In fact, I don’t want him to have to give up that life. It hurts to think of having to slow him down in doing something we both passionately care about. Maybe that means that it would be better just to carry on the way we are, so that he can live the life of an international volunteer. He already has an assignment in the Middle East and one in Central Africa in the next few months. I am going to have to get used to him being away for weeks at a time.
Caramel 