To me, all romance is a bit of a mystery. What is it that makes two people feel that spark which causes a whole cascade of emotions to ripple inside of them? It’s not just hormones. I am very aware of my hormones, and I keep meaning to work on a post about my hormones, but it isn’t just that.
The desire to share myself and the hunger for him. To know as much as I can, his preferences, his moods, his habits, his peeves. To want to know it, and to want to love it all. The whispering of words I would not dream of uttering to any other soul.
There is more, a mysterious more. A riddle that cannot be cracked. A magnetism beyond all detection. An invisible piece of string that is knotted around the core of two people and means they pull each other ever closely as they pull on each other’s hearts.
Have you ever been at a book store surrounded by attractive book covers, and then for some reason picked up a book that didn’t stand out amongst the rest. But as you read the summary on the back and the forward, something just drew you in. What is that something that captures your attention and stirs your appetite?
Why is that despite knowing plenty of physically attractive men who seem “nice” as far as I know them, one man can walk into a room and in a short time make a big enough impression to make me feel safer with him than anyone I have known for years? What is about all the interactions and communication between us that has left me beguiled and enchanted? Why is the time we have together never enough, but I am always left yearning for more?
Why is it that being in his arms, receiving his glances and kisses and touches feels pure, yet exquisite, while other men make me feel uncomfortable and defensive? Why does it feel as if we are performing a perfect harmony, while in reality we are only engaging in mundane actions? Eating together, walking together, sitting on the bus together. Yet it always feels thrilling.
It is a complete and utter mystery to me. It is delicious and dazzling romance. It is so far beyond hormones, I cannot fathom to explain it. But it is one of the highlights of life and energises me to do things I thought were impossible.