On Monday I published a post with my answers to questions that were part of the GETTING TO KNOW YOU challenge. In response to one of the questions I included a video of two wonderful opera singers dueting the beautiful Barcarolle – “La Nuit D’Amour” – from Offenbach’s “Tales Of Hoffman”.
It is a very beautiful song in itself…but I wondered how many other bloggers become choked up by it because of it’s connection with a film that many say is one of their favourite all time films. “La Vida Es Bella” or “Life Is Beautiful” – the story of Guido, a Jewish Italian waiter and later bookshop owner who falls in love with Dora and fathers a son named Giosuè (Joshua).
If you have never seen the film, I have added a trailer right at the bottom of this post. If you have seen this film, you totally understand why I felt teary-eyed listening to the Barcarolle! Although full of comedy, make no mistake, this is an incredibly moving film, exhibiting the courage and love of a father who seeks to protect his family from the horrors that surround them.
When I think of what others have suffered…it makes all my woes seem petty and insignificant.
Here are two clips – the night on the concert theatre … followed by a scene from the concentration camp.
Here is the trailer I promised you:
At the time I did not feel I could tell my family because they would insist I left London and returned to them. I was desperate to start working towards being back in my life/world/career/flat – which were all in London. Stuart was very supportive, but most of my contact with him was via e-mails. I just tried to deal with the challenges that came my way and kept a lot back from Stuart because I was afraid of him becoming too angry. I knew I could always call the police if things became too bad.
His idea is taking a picture of me that shows the shape of my body now and then take another photo after he has had me on his training program – you know how people post their before and after photos on their social media sites. He wants me to follow his prescribed eating plan and to work out with him every day down at the gym. He wants to make me a more attractive shape. I am of course horrified. He wants to set goals for me that I personally am not keen on.
We truly are like chalk and cheese. He is my boss so I don’t want to be picky over things that don’t cross my boundary of what is acceptable. I am trying to find a balance so that I don’t come across as hostile towards him.
I cannot bear it when my boss touches me. I say “please keep your hands to yourself”. But I realize there are men and women who are ok with someone who has no romantic connection being overly tactile/friendly with their hands. He makes my skin crawl. But I keep asking myself if I am being overly sensitive after what happened to me?
But he did take me to his gym – I chose to swim while he went to work out. Then after an hour, he came down to the pool and yelled at me to get out of the water. Everyone was looking at me. He told me to join him in the jacuzzi – which is next to the pool. Then he said he wanted to show me something else. He took me into the steam room. I felt sick. He kept telling me to sit next to him. I told him I was not comfortable and walked out. He was furious with me for the rest of the day.
My boss was taking his two house-guests (a married couple) out for dinner and asked me to join them. I thought it would be alright with them there. I really like them. I have speaking to them in their language (which my boss does not speak) all week. Even they told me I should get out of here and find somewhere else! However, in the restaurant, he started running his hand up and down my thigh. Yuck! I reacted by deliberately moving my chair as far away as possible. But I actually wanted to pour my wine all over him. I think I hate him. I don’t think I have hated anyone like this before.
He has been angry with me all week after I told him not to touch me. He has raised his voice and sworn at me. He has called me all sorts of names. I have been sweet and calm and incredibly gracious. Sometimes I am shaking because I cannot stand being in his presence, but I am determined to control my anger and behave like a princess.
I was typing some letters for him, while he sat on the sofa and dictated to me what to write. He came over and put his hands on my shoulders and tied to start massaging me. (He tells me he is a trained masseur.) Immediately I raised my shoulders, to which he told me I was very tense. I asked to him to remove his hands. He was so angry, he swore at me again and told me there is something wrong with me.
He really wants me to sit and watch television with him. It used to be alright to sit on the sofa opposite him, but he keeps telling me to sit next to him. If he wants a woman to snuggle up on the sofa next to him, he needs to try out a dating site – not threaten his house-keeper.
He came over and without asking he just started with the massage thing again.
Tonight he was all nicey nicey, calling me “darlin” and complimenting me and telling me how much he is looking forward to our Friday evening in together (so it seems as if Friday is going to be a regular feature). The last two Fridays I was in control. I kept on topping up the glasses. Mine I filled with water and elderflower cordial and his with wine. He didn’t seem to realize what I was doing. Both weeks he fell asleep on the sofa.
He has kissed me on the cheek twice in the past 2 hours. The first time I asked him what he was doing. He shook his head and said he cannot understand me. Not long after that he put his hand on my face and said he is “ever so fond of me”. He has sent me upstairs to change into something more comfortable so I can sunbathe next to him in the garden. I am really creeped out.
He went to the gym on his own this morning (he was obviously very angry when I refused to go into the steam room with him ) so I worked in the garden all morning and now I am very pleased because I am scratched to smitherenes – scratch marks up your arms and legs are not particularly enhancing…
As soon as I had set up his computer to make a start, he was there behind me. I felt his hands on the back of my neck and instantly pushed my chair back and leant forward to pick up the file with his notes pretending I had a question to ask him. Well, I kept the chair back and sat on the edge and leant forward so he couldn’t reach my neck. Then he said he was pleased because now he could reach my back. He lifted up my top and tried to massage my lower back. I grabbed my top and pulled it down and said I would prefer him not to do that. He have me some technical description of the kind of massage he wants to be able to try on me. I said that I don’t have any tension in any part of my back. I said I could understand why he thought I may need a neck massage after being at the computer for so long, but I would not enjoy having my back massaged (definitely not by him – but of course I didn’t say this). Anyway he muttered that I am a strange girl.
But then he was back again in a flash. I was now sitting in the chair upright and he was standing behind me dictating. But after a couple of minutes his hands were wandering down to my lower back, I started wriggling around and moved my chair again. I asked him to take his hands off me. Again he put his hands on my lower back and said he couldn’t tell if I had tension there or not. I said I really didn’t, I said it’s hard to feel anything there because of all of my “padding”. He said not to put myself down and started complimenting my body – cringe!!!!!! I said I don’t have any problem with my body, and then I turned right around and said that it really is none of his concern what my body is like and he had no right to touch me. I was glaring at him. He muttered something which I didn’t make out, but it ended with your name. I asked him what he had said. He muttered again something about my love-handles being good for Stuart. I said “pardon?” He said “lucky Stuart”. I ignored him. To be honest I thought he was being sarcastic at first. So I just ignored him and carried on typing. He then came up close and whispered in my ear “lucky Stuart”.
This morning he insisted that I sat down and had a chat with him over a coffee. He was in his robe and sat exposing his “crown jewels” yet again. I held my coffee mug in front of my face to obscure the sight of them. He was clearly irritated and asked me why I was hiding my mug to my face. I told him his wrinklies were on display again.
As I approached I realized what was actually happening. My boss had his back to the door but I could see what he was doing to himself. I could also see that the woman who was crying was on the screen of his laptop. As soon as I realized she was naked and tied up and being forced to do things I am not going to write about – I felt as if I was going to be physically sick. I removed myself silently from the hallway. I thought about what to do. I opened the front door and slammed it shut. Within a few moments, my boss appeared and said: “Oh you’re back from your walk, do you fancy a cuppa?”
Caramel 