Happier And Healthier

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IMG_20180722_123051 (2)I woke up today to find a text message on my phone from Goldfinch. I was so tired and my head hurt, but I was so glad to see his name on my phone. It is a wonderful way to wake up.

His message indicated to me that he is happy. That’s really good isn’t it. Haven’t I always said I just want him to be happy and healthy. He is already feeling happier and healthier over in Australia. He is happier and healthier without me.

Then the sadness came. Such a lovely happy message from Goldfinch…and yet it became a blow to me…another reason for me to doubt he will ever come back. Another reason to doubt I will ever see him again.

I fully intended to be happy that he is happy. That’s what I want to be. But it hurts. Nothing hurts like no Goldfinch.

And there’s something else…I have to tell Goldfinch something. It’s going to be hard. I don’t know he is going to feel. It’s six weeks since he was here. I have news for him, and I don’t know how to tell him. It’s so clear he is happier and healthier there. I am going to have to think long and hard and find the right words.

26 thoughts on “Happier And Healthier”

    1. I will have to save a lot more pennies before I can make it there.
      I am going to discuss it with my consultant to see if he has any issues with me being up in the air and I would probably need a letter for my travel insurance due to the medical issues my head injuries have caused.

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    1. That’s true…
      …but my lovely Goldfinch is a self-confessed pleasure seeker. Much of his happiness comes from enjoying life and not letting himself become overly anxious. I do think he will make sure he is happy.

      He and I are different in that respect…my happiness is less about pleasure and more about working hard and feeling satisfaction.

      I wrote about how I found it hard to understand when he told me he was a hedonist ages ago…but I finally understood after spending months with him…

      https://crushedcaramel.wordpress.com/2018/07/26/understanding-what-he-meant-by-hedonist/

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  7. First off why would you do that? Tantalize and than oooops gone not gonna tell you. I am sitting here biting my nails. Secondly you talk about him coming back to you or not. What about you going there if he were to invite you? Hugs my darling girl. I always play devil’s advocate and I am romantic and you are a meanie not telling what you have to tell…….(JK)

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